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Солярикс
Спасенный из руин Цитадели Космической Бет, Рик пытается сбросить настройки своей портальной пушки, но случайно отправляет всех, кто путешествовал между измерениями, в их первоначальные измерения. Морти возвращается в мир Кроненберга из «Зелья Рика №9», Джерри меняется местами с Джерри из «Второго сезона» из-за событий «Ночного забега Морти», а Рик переносится в свою первоначальную вселенную, где его жена Диана и его Бет были убиты Риком Праймом[2], который является настоящим дедом Морти. Пока Саммер и обе Бет возвращаются в Цитадель, чтобы установить межпространственный маяк, Рик узнает, что Рик Прайм также был перенесен в результате сброса. Оригинальный Джерри говорит Морти, что его Бет и Саммер не пережили заморозку в «Искуплении Рика Рикшенка»[a]. Джерри бросает Морти, чтобы двигаться дальше. Рик спасает Морти и ведет его к Рику Прайму, чтобы тот противостоял ему, но обнаруживает тщательно продуманную ловушку. Морти убеждает его спасти остальных членов семьи. Однако, когда семья забирает Джерри и возвращается домой, они сталкиваются с Джерри из второго сезона, который выпускает инопланетянина по имени мистер Фрундлс, быстро размножающегося и вынуждающего семью переселиться в другое измерение, где все их двойники погибли.
«Соларикс» — премьерный эпизод шестого сезона анимационного телесериала «Рик и Морти» канала Adult Swim. Это 52-й эпизод сериала в целом. Сценарий написал Албро Ланди, а режиссёром выступил Джейкоб Хэйр. Эпизод вышел в эфир 4 сентября 2022 года. Эпизод напрямую продолжает события финала предыдущего сезона, «Рикмурай Джек».
- 00:00:07,298 --> 00:00:10,343 <i>Guess this is how it ends. I thought I was better than this.</i>
- 00:00:10,760 --> 00:00:13,263 <i>Dramatic voiceover while stranded in space?</i>
- 00:00:13,596 --> 00:00:17,016 <i>I guess when you’re dying the first thing to go is your creativity.</i>
- 00:00:17,642 --> 00:00:19,018 <i>Citadel’s gone...</i>
- 00:00:19,519 --> 00:00:21,980 <i>And-and the saucer we escaped in is out of power</i>
- 00:00:21,980 --> 00:00:23,440 Aw man I’m so scared in here.
- 00:00:23,440 --> 00:00:25,108 <i>The extra Mortys went feral.</i>
- 00:00:26,359 --> 00:00:28,319 <i>Eh, some problems solve themselves.</i>
- 00:00:29,070 --> 00:00:32,157 Been drinking a lot... Morty! I told you to write this down!
- 00:00:32,157 --> 00:00:34,826 I don’t have a helmet like that Avengers guy did.
- 00:00:35,326 --> 00:00:39,080 Been drinking a lot of my piss. Portal gun’s still broken.
- 00:00:39,164 --> 00:00:41,207 Guess that was all part of Evil Morty’s plan.
- 00:00:41,291 --> 00:00:43,585 “Evil Morty.” Can we stop flattering this guy?
- 00:00:43,585 --> 00:00:45,920 His “plan” was to monologue and fuck off,
- 00:00:46,004 --> 00:00:48,673 he basically threw a tantrum to announce he was quitting Twitter.
- 00:00:48,757 --> 00:00:50,008 Nobody quits Twitter.
- 00:00:51,301 --> 00:00:55,263 Hey remember like a second ago, when you pretended not to know who Iron Man was?
- 00:00:55,638 --> 00:00:56,681 Who was that for?
- 00:00:57,015 --> 00:00:59,601 Shush shush Morty. This is how we go.
- 00:00:59,601 --> 00:01:01,060 Bear it with grace.
- 00:01:01,144 --> 00:01:04,814 Spinal cord: Robitussin as a base, then surprise me.
- 00:01:15,408 --> 00:01:16,785 - Mom! - Beth maybe!
- 00:01:17,952 --> 00:01:21,039 Is she trying to say something? We can’t hear you.
- 00:01:21,581 --> 00:01:25,001 How dumb are. Beth, you’re in a vacuum, sound travels on air.
- 00:01:25,335 --> 00:01:26,503 Why am I yelling?
- 00:01:29,756 --> 00:01:32,342 - Wow, great. - Yeah that’s..., really worth it
- 00:01:32,342 --> 00:01:34,803 That was not worth it. It’s corny.
- 00:01:34,803 --> 00:01:38,097 You. Corn. Dying of starvation here!
- 00:01:39,182 --> 00:01:41,768 Oh my God. Stop explaining. Stop explaining!
- 00:01:41,768 --> 00:01:43,102 Are you finished?
- 00:01:43,561 --> 00:01:44,479 She’s not finished.
- 00:01:45,772 --> 00:01:47,357 - Oh Real mature, real classy - Oh nice.
- 00:02:22,892 --> 00:02:24,060 It was a good line, honey.
- 00:02:24,060 --> 00:02:25,520 I didn’t need it to be, I don’t care what you think.
- 00:02:25,520 --> 00:02:28,022 Oh my God she found you, here, eat eat eat.
- 00:02:28,106 --> 00:02:29,232 Oh hell yes.
- 00:02:29,232 --> 00:02:31,276 Hold on, buddy, our systems could go into shock from solid food.
- 00:02:31,276 --> 00:02:34,112 Digestibot, convert to nutrient mass.
- 00:02:43,246 --> 00:02:44,163 I’m just gonna risk it.
- 00:02:44,956 --> 00:02:48,167 Since when you do you guys get stranded? Thank you by the way.
- 00:02:48,251 --> 00:02:50,503 - Almost left them out there. - Portal travel’s broken.
- 00:02:51,212 --> 00:02:54,048 Are these heirloom tomatoes? Digestibot, try these.
- 00:02:54,132 --> 00:02:56,259 So you can’t hop realities anymore.
- 00:02:56,259 --> 00:02:58,344 Does that mean you’ll finally have to wash your robe?
- 00:02:58,428 --> 00:03:01,097 Good point, I need to reboot the portal index immediately.
- 00:03:02,223 --> 00:03:04,392 Basically just a hard reset on the fluid.
- 00:03:04,392 --> 00:03:06,436 Hold tight, the Earth’s gonna shake a bit.
- 00:03:19,532 --> 00:03:21,826 - Oh shit. - Wait, what’s happening?
- 00:03:21,910 --> 00:03:25,622 Instead of resetting portal travel, I may have reset portal travelers.
- 00:03:25,622 --> 00:03:29,208 - Too late to apologize. - Rick, why am I pulsing green?
- 00:03:29,542 --> 00:03:31,753 don’t say you don’t know because you’re pulsing green.
- 00:03:31,753 --> 00:03:33,129 - Rick are we about to die? - No.
- 00:03:33,129 --> 00:03:35,965 - We’re about to vanish from this reality. - That’s totally dying!
- 00:03:36,049 --> 00:03:39,427 No it isn’t, everyone from this reality returning to their reality of origin.
- 00:03:39,427 --> 00:03:41,137 Back to our original universes?
- 00:03:41,137 --> 00:03:43,765 I explained it fine, Morty, you’re spoonfeeding spoons!
- 00:03:43,765 --> 00:03:46,059 - Where’s Summer? - Oh nice, you guys are back
- 00:03:46,434 --> 00:03:48,144 Summer. Three of us are one-way blind hopping,
- 00:03:48,144 --> 00:03:49,437 you gotta help us get back.
- 00:03:49,437 --> 00:03:52,440 There’s a protocol for this in your chore server, filename Booger AIDs.
- 00:03:52,440 --> 00:03:55,193 - Every file is Booger AIDS! - I hate naming things!
- 00:03:55,193 --> 00:03:58,488 Just search for words like “one way blind hop reset nav beacon.”
- 00:03:58,488 --> 00:04:01,324 - Why do I have a “reality of origin?” - There’s no time to explain, Jerry!
- 00:04:01,324 --> 00:04:04,243 Counting on you, Summer! One way blind hop beacon protocol!
- 00:04:04,327 --> 00:04:07,413 Here we go!
- 00:04:10,917 --> 00:04:12,335 So there was time to explain.
- 00:04:12,335 --> 00:04:14,837 Don’t waste extra precious seconds with your pettiness, Jerry!
- 00:04:14,921 --> 00:04:15,755 Summer, let’s run down...
- 00:04:15,755 --> 00:04:18,049 One way blind hop reset beacon booger AIDS.
- 00:04:18,049 --> 00:04:19,050 Cool.
- 00:04:20,635 --> 00:04:22,804 There was so much time to explain!
- 00:04:22,804 --> 00:04:26,182 Yes! Fine, hindsight is twenty twenty! Who has ever taken this long to vanish?
- 00:04:26,182 --> 00:04:28,643 How did I end up not in my own universe?!
- 00:04:28,643 --> 00:04:30,395 Oh my god. The Jerryboree!
- 00:04:31,437 --> 00:04:33,231 - The Jerryboree. - Deep cut.
- 00:04:35,525 --> 00:04:38,236 Wait, but... where’s our real Dad and our real Morty?
- 00:04:38,236 --> 00:04:39,404 Buried in the backyard!
- 00:04:39,862 --> 00:04:41,281 That’s what the possums are after.
- 00:04:45,576 --> 00:04:47,704 Dad’s got you in the family business too, huh?
- 00:04:47,704 --> 00:04:50,999 Yeah, Morty’s an easy mark but Rick pays me in things like...
- 00:04:52,333 --> 00:04:53,668 Wolverine claws.
- 00:04:53,668 --> 00:04:57,171 Whelp, looks like you got this. See you guys in another, two years?
- 00:04:57,255 --> 00:04:59,215 Or... you could stick around for this one?
- 00:04:59,215 --> 00:05:01,426 Looks like it involves Grandpa’s grody citadel,
- 00:05:01,426 --> 00:05:03,553 we could, y’know, break things. Loot stuff.
- 00:05:03,553 --> 00:05:07,390 Should, probably get back to saving the galaxy...
- 00:05:07,390 --> 00:05:08,516 Please.
- 00:05:09,851 --> 00:05:12,186 Guess I could loot some stuff. Fine. Yeah, OK let’s make it quick.
- 00:05:12,270 --> 00:05:15,606 Awesome, I’ve never been. Let’s do this, adventure family! Woo! Haha!
- 00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:19,068 Ok.
- 00:05:23,906 --> 00:05:24,866 Fuck.
- 00:05:30,413 --> 00:05:33,249 <i>Excuse me? Bro, Ricks don’t pass on this.</i>
- 00:05:36,377 --> 00:05:38,171 <i>Rick? Is that you?</i>
- 00:05:38,504 --> 00:05:39,964 Yeah... Diane.
- 00:05:40,048 --> 00:05:43,509 <i>You’ve been gone so long. Did you find our daughter’s killer?</i>
- 00:05:43,593 --> 00:05:46,512 - Not yet, sorry. Still looking. <i>- You’ll find him.</i>
- 00:05:46,596 --> 00:05:49,682 <i>You always do everything you set your mind to.</i>
- 00:05:49,766 --> 00:05:53,144 <i>Except keep your family alive. But that was hardly your fault.</i>
- 00:05:53,144 --> 00:05:54,395 Mute.
- 00:05:54,479 --> 00:05:58,191 If I could be muted, I wouldn’t be too good at haunting you,
- 00:05:58,191 --> 00:06:01,569 - would I, you dirty bear? - Yeah, forgot I wanted to be haunted.
- 00:06:01,569 --> 00:06:05,239 <i>I guess you predicted you might. That’s where haunting comes in handy, huh?</i>
- 00:06:05,323 --> 00:06:06,949 Very good point, sugar.
- 00:06:14,457 --> 00:06:15,375 Rick?
- 00:06:19,087 --> 00:06:22,548 Hello? Original family? Sorry about last time.
- 00:06:22,632 --> 00:06:25,927 Rick, he was in space prison, we couldn’t just...
- 00:06:25,927 --> 00:06:26,928 hello?
- 00:06:35,394 --> 00:06:36,395 Aw jeez.
- 00:06:59,961 --> 00:07:03,089 Fuck. Dammit Morty, there’s no doctors anymore.
- 00:07:03,089 --> 00:07:04,090 Dad?
- 00:07:07,385 --> 00:07:09,428 <i>Figures it’s underwhelming the one time I visit.</i>
- 00:07:09,512 --> 00:07:12,932 <i>Sorry usually there’s cowboy Rick and Mortys and stuff.</i>
- 00:07:13,724 --> 00:07:16,519 <i>Looks like they could use a couple repairman Rick and Mortys, right?</i>
- 00:07:17,562 --> 00:07:21,065 <i>Tight, little scavenger dudes. If they shoot at us I’m allowed to...</i>
- 00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:24,318 <i>do this. Shit yeah.</i>
- 00:07:27,864 --> 00:07:29,323 <i>Space Mom, get in on this!</i>
- 00:07:33,536 --> 00:07:34,495 <i>Cool Mom!</i>
- 00:07:34,579 --> 00:07:36,247 <i>Let’s keep it moving, I don’t have all day.</i>
- 00:07:37,582 --> 00:07:38,374 <i>I got it!</i>
- 00:07:40,543 --> 00:07:42,628 <i>I got it! I got it! Sorry!</i>
- 00:07:43,921 --> 00:07:46,549 <i>Sorry! I got it. Sorry!</i>
- 00:07:48,885 --> 00:07:50,344 <i>I was gonna do it.</i>
- 00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:52,388 <i>Terrestrials, am I right?</i>
- 00:07:53,181 --> 00:07:55,349 <i>I kept up the search in your absence.</i>
- 00:07:55,433 --> 00:07:57,518 <i>You want a new list of potential locations?</i>
- 00:07:57,602 --> 00:07:59,937 You’re always just one room away?
- 00:08:00,021 --> 00:08:03,441 <i>Remember, you thought if you could see or touch me</i>
- 00:08:03,441 --> 00:08:05,651 <i>it might give you a level of com comfort.</i>
- 00:08:05,735 --> 00:08:08,696 Right. Can’t have that. Come on, Summer.
- 00:08:08,696 --> 00:08:11,157 <i>Who’s Summer? Should I be jealous?</i>
- 00:08:11,157 --> 00:08:14,535 <i>knows what happens to the people you love.</i>
- 00:08:19,207 --> 00:08:22,168 - Hey Rick. - Hey, Mr. Goldmanbachmajorian.
- 00:08:22,543 --> 00:08:24,337 Still alive, huh? What’s up?
- 00:08:24,337 --> 00:08:28,424 I was wondering if you could help me make sense of a note I found this morning?
- 00:08:28,758 --> 00:08:31,802 It’s written by someone claiming to be me.
- 00:08:31,886 --> 00:08:34,764 They say my mind is held captive in a time loop,
- 00:08:34,764 --> 00:08:39,310 trapped in the day of a traumatic event by the agony of a formidable intelligence.
- 00:08:39,310 --> 00:08:41,854 But also that my captor forgot about aging...
- 00:08:41,938 --> 00:08:46,984 that my body spoils and yearns for death while my soul remains stuck in place
- 00:08:47,068 --> 00:08:48,945 caught, like a fly in amber.
- 00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:52,615 Right. I used to drink, drink. No clue pal.
- 00:08:52,615 --> 00:08:55,534 That’s Ok. I found other notes in the trash just like it.
- 00:08:55,618 --> 00:08:59,288 Poor weirdo. I pity them, wish they could let go, and move on.
- 00:08:59,372 --> 00:09:01,082 - Sounds healthy. - Sure would be.
- 00:09:05,753 --> 00:09:07,171 <i>Sweet death.</i>
- 00:09:07,630 --> 00:09:10,132 <i>Was that symbolic? Are you letting go?</i>
- 00:09:10,466 --> 00:09:12,635 <i>I understand, baby. I forgive you...</i>
- 00:09:12,635 --> 00:09:14,470 You don’t get to say that! You’re not her.
- 00:09:14,470 --> 00:09:16,889 You’re a thing I built to torture myself.
- 00:09:16,973 --> 00:09:20,142 This whole fucking timeline is cursed. I gotta get out of here.
- 00:09:20,226 --> 00:09:21,727 <i>Because you want to move on.</i>
- 00:09:21,811 --> 00:09:26,565 Because I don’t. And I have to. I came back on accident.
- 00:09:26,649 --> 00:09:28,025 Guy I’m looking for he’s...
- 00:09:28,109 --> 00:09:29,652 he’s not findable, Diane.
- 00:09:31,404 --> 00:09:33,155 I live with a version of Beth, now.
- 00:09:33,739 --> 00:09:35,574 <i>Sounds like a version of nice.</i>
- 00:09:35,658 --> 00:09:38,953 We have grandkids. That’s who Summer is. She’s gonna get me out of here.
- 00:09:39,662 --> 00:09:40,913 She reminds me of you.
- 00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:43,249 <i>Really? Is she dead too?</i>
- 00:09:43,958 --> 00:09:45,001 Bye, Diane.
- 00:09:45,001 --> 00:09:48,546 <i>You’re not honestly gonna fly into that rift without coordinates, are you?</i>
- 00:09:48,546 --> 00:09:50,131 <i>Don’t give up on us, Rick.</i>
- 00:09:50,131 --> 00:09:52,842 <i>I don’t make the rules. Haunters gonna haunt.</i>
- 00:09:59,265 --> 00:10:01,642 <i>Baby? Are you killing yourself?</i>
- 00:10:01,726 --> 00:10:04,478 I’m more embracing the “win win” of risking my life.
- 00:10:13,946 --> 00:10:15,281 Where’s Mom and Summer?
- 00:10:15,281 --> 00:10:17,616 They’re gone. Sorry, Morty.
- 00:10:17,700 --> 00:10:18,659 Gone gone?
- 00:10:18,743 --> 00:10:20,870 We spent a long time in that ice.
- 00:10:20,870 --> 00:10:24,081 A gentle mutant licked us out but Beth got sick,
- 00:10:24,165 --> 00:10:25,625 and Summer didn’t thaw right.
- 00:10:27,668 --> 00:10:30,546 With no one left to blame, I finally had to deal with myself.
- 00:10:30,546 --> 00:10:32,214 Buried my grief at Barnes and Noble.
- 00:10:32,590 --> 00:10:36,385 Four Agreements, Eat Pray Love, Frank Miller’s The Dark Knight Returns.
- 00:10:36,469 --> 00:10:38,679 Learned to accept things for what they are.
- 00:10:39,722 --> 00:10:42,600 In a few of these the whole brain is still intact.
- 00:10:42,600 --> 00:10:45,936 Makes you wonder if some people were still in there, just trapped in the horror.
- 00:10:46,562 --> 00:10:48,105 Anyway it’s awesome protein.
- 00:10:48,189 --> 00:10:52,777 I’m so sorry, Dad. But. My real, original Dad beat the apocalypse.
- 00:10:53,361 --> 00:10:55,863 I guess we all underestimated you.
- 00:10:55,863 --> 00:10:58,824 Hey. What’s that game we always used to try to play as a family,
- 00:10:58,908 --> 00:11:00,534 y- the one we never finished...
- 00:11:00,618 --> 00:11:02,411 - Downbeat. - Yes! Let’s play Downbeat.
- 00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:04,622 I bet I can find it! We can finish now.
- 00:11:04,622 --> 00:11:07,208 Yeah, you should totally do that.
- 00:11:11,379 --> 00:11:14,006 Cool, I got it! We’ll play Downbeat...
- 00:11:14,090 --> 00:11:16,967 and we’ll camp here tonight and then rebuild the house.
- 00:11:17,426 --> 00:11:21,013 Y’know we got food, <i>fresh water,</i> and we’ve got family...
- 00:11:21,722 --> 00:11:22,640 Da fuck?
- 00:11:24,683 --> 00:11:28,479 <i>Morty. I wrote this note in advance in case you’re wondering how I left so fast.</i>
- 00:11:28,479 --> 00:11:30,106 <i>My plan is to wait for you to turn your back,</i>
- 00:11:30,106 --> 00:11:32,274 <i>then I’m going to grab all your shit and split.</i>
- 00:11:32,358 --> 00:11:34,110 <i>Depending on how long you were out of the room,</i>
- 00:11:34,110 --> 00:11:36,695 <i>you’ll probably be thinking I can’t be that far away</i>
- 00:11:36,779 --> 00:11:38,322 <i>and you’ll want to foll...</i>
- 00:11:40,783 --> 00:11:42,368 <i>Morty, wrote this fast cuz had to set trap,</i>
- 00:11:42,368 --> 00:11:44,412 <i>thought you’d have cooler shit, see other note bye.</i>
- 00:11:44,412 --> 00:11:45,413 Mother fucker...
- 00:11:46,455 --> 00:11:48,499 Slow down! Slow down! Not cool! Oh!
- 00:11:50,376 --> 00:11:52,711 - What the hell, Dad? - Don’t take it personal, Morty.
- 00:11:52,795 --> 00:11:55,297 That’s one of the Four Agreements. I don’t remember the other three,
- 00:11:55,381 --> 00:11:57,967 but I know Commissioner Gordon was cool with Batman moving on.
- 00:11:57,967 --> 00:12:01,053 - Batman doesn’t abandon people! - You abandoned us.
- 00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:04,723 I deserve that. But, y’know, it improved you...
- 00:12:05,474 --> 00:12:07,143 Oh, am I cool enough for you now?
- 00:12:07,143 --> 00:12:10,479 Well that was easy, it only cost me fucking everything.
- 00:12:10,563 --> 00:12:11,480 Whoa, hey, I...
- 00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:14,316 You came back and talked about us like we weren’t people, Morty!
- 00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:16,152 Then you bailed, and left us to freeze!
- 00:12:16,152 --> 00:12:19,989 - I was apologizing for that earlier... - Your mom and sister died, Morty!
- 00:12:21,574 --> 00:12:24,201 And I moved on. From caring.
- 00:12:24,785 --> 00:12:26,287 And that is the best deal you will ever get.
- 00:12:27,413 --> 00:12:28,289 So take it.
- 00:12:28,289 --> 00:12:32,501 Please don’t go. If Rick comes back, we can find you a new reality,
- 00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:35,004 a new Mom, new Summer, a job!
- 00:12:35,463 --> 00:12:36,964 Oh you don’t get it, kid.
- 00:12:36,964 --> 00:12:39,300 Except for this conversation, my life is perfect.
- 00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:42,678 Rick was always right... everyone needs to let go.
- 00:12:48,476 --> 00:12:51,395 Aw, you came back... I guess we really did form a bond...
- 00:12:51,979 --> 00:12:54,482 Hey stop it! Get away from me! No, help!
- 00:12:55,441 --> 00:12:58,486 <i>Alright, pin dropped, Grandpa! Come and get us.</i>
- 00:13:01,155 --> 00:13:02,740 <i>Come on, come on, come on!</i>
- 00:13:02,740 --> 00:13:05,117 <i>Baby? Something to keep in mind:</i>
- 00:13:05,201 --> 00:13:07,578 <i>If you were pulled home by whatever happened,</i>
- 00:13:08,037 --> 00:13:09,830 <i>it’s likely our target was as well.</i>
- 00:13:10,456 --> 00:13:13,501 <i>It’s also likely he’s having as much trouble leaving as you are.</i>
- 00:13:15,044 --> 00:13:16,337 He’s trapped.
- 00:13:18,464 --> 00:13:20,549 -<i>Grandpa!</i> - Oh fuck yes!
- 00:13:25,095 --> 00:13:26,180 Grandpa?
- 00:13:26,180 --> 00:13:28,349 Summer! Gold star, always believed in you.
- 00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:30,100 <i>- Now the hard part. - Hard part?</i>
- 00:13:30,184 --> 00:13:32,102 <i>Way worse things than me can see that beacon too.</i>
- 00:13:32,186 --> 00:13:34,563 <i>Hunker down and protect it while I grab Morty. Rick out!</i>
- 00:13:34,647 --> 00:13:36,023 <i>Try to survive!</i>
- 00:13:36,023 --> 00:13:38,817 Oh shit. <i>Domestic Mom should hide maybe?</i>
- 00:13:38,901 --> 00:13:41,904 <i>-“Domestic Mom”? - I mean she’s the cool space one.</i>
- 00:13:41,904 --> 00:13:44,490 <i>Look I’m not looking to get caught in whatever this is,</i>
- 00:13:44,490 --> 00:13:46,408 <i>you guys can both hide maybe, hash it out.</i>
- 00:13:46,492 --> 00:13:49,495 <i>Oh quit talking down! I’m you with the patience to do laundry.</i>
- 00:13:49,495 --> 00:13:51,539 <i>Mom stop being jealous of our bond!</i>
- 00:13:51,539 --> 00:13:54,542 <i>She ran from our choices, I have to parent them.</i>
- 00:13:54,542 --> 00:13:57,253 <i>It’s not like I didn’t care, that’s what the clone was for.</i>
- 00:13:58,629 --> 00:13:59,547 <i>Moms!</i>
- 00:14:13,269 --> 00:14:14,645 - Morty! - Rick?
- 00:14:14,645 --> 00:14:17,231 I knew it, I knew you wouldn’t leave me!
- 00:14:17,231 --> 00:14:18,357 Da fuck?
- 00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:22,444 Morty did you see another Rick here? Nondescript haircut, scifi jacket?
- 00:14:22,528 --> 00:14:24,405 Of course you didn’t see him, you’d be dead.
- 00:14:24,405 --> 00:14:25,739 Or you’d be a bomb.
- 00:14:26,323 --> 00:14:29,535 Do you feel bomby? Nah, you woulda blown up by now.
- 00:14:29,535 --> 00:14:32,580 Wasn’t the Rick here dead? That’s, that’s why you pick places right?
- 00:14:33,622 --> 00:14:37,418 Well, your Rick, yeah, not dead, more like, not around.
- 00:14:37,418 --> 00:14:40,129 When I met you I was sorta hoping he might turn up one day,
- 00:14:40,129 --> 00:14:41,714 You son of a bitch! I got you!
- 00:14:42,381 --> 00:14:45,467 - Where are we going? - To kill your grandpa, little buddy.
- 00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:46,468 Wait, what?
- 00:14:47,303 --> 00:14:50,556 I don’t understand. My original Rick killed your family?
- 00:14:50,556 --> 00:14:52,266 And you were just waiting for him to come back?
- 00:14:52,266 --> 00:14:55,894 Seems like you understand fine, Morty. That was A+ repiping. We’re here.
- 00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:01,775 This guy Morty, he hates being found but loves building elaborate shit.
- 00:15:01,859 --> 00:15:04,528 Like playing a ton of Minecraft but all on a private server.
- 00:15:04,612 --> 00:15:07,448 Am I in a fucking K-hole right now, what is going on?
- 00:15:11,660 --> 00:15:12,786 <i>Whoa, hoho, you found me!</i>
- 00:15:14,622 --> 00:15:18,542 <i>I shoot the first monitor too. Listen, I’m not here. Or am I?</i>
- 00:15:19,752 --> 00:15:22,504 <i>There’s the clone you found. Or maybe it’s me, all naked!</i>
- 00:15:22,588 --> 00:15:26,008 <i>Just a lil Keyser Söze. I mean why would I admit it’s not?</i>
- 00:15:26,592 --> 00:15:28,969 <i>Look at him! Look at him go, look at him dance.</i>
- 00:15:29,053 --> 00:15:33,724 <i>Or me, again, it might be me, Like a Saw thing, I’m very sneaky.</i>
- 00:15:33,724 --> 00:15:36,602 <i>Here’s a bunch of killbots to deal with while ya wrestle with that.</i>
- 00:15:41,607 --> 00:15:44,693 <i>Obviously I don’t know who I’m talking to here, it’s all prerecorded.</i>
- 00:15:46,612 --> 00:15:49,531 <i>But if you got this far, you probably think you’re real special.</i>
- 00:15:49,948 --> 00:15:50,949 <i>Tell you what.</i>
- 00:15:51,033 --> 00:15:53,661 <i>There he goes! Maybe that actually was me!</i>
- 00:15:53,661 --> 00:15:55,954 <i>If you follow him down there we can do a big fight.</i>
- 00:15:56,330 --> 00:15:58,332 <i>Fifty percent chance I’m not lying.</i>
- 00:16:00,042 --> 00:16:03,045 <i>We’re in trouble asshole! I shouldn’t have to beg.</i>
- 00:16:03,045 --> 00:16:05,589 - Wait, my moms are in trouble? - Those versions of them are.
- 00:16:05,673 --> 00:16:08,175 We gotta save them! Rick this is an obvious trap.
- 00:16:08,175 --> 00:16:10,427 If you go down there he’s just gonna kill you...
- 00:16:10,511 --> 00:16:11,679 - Good! - What?
- 00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:14,890 Now what?
- 00:16:14,890 --> 00:16:17,434 If you don’t care if you die, why do you care if I die
- 00:16:17,518 --> 00:16:18,936 Knock it off! Get out of here!
- 00:16:18,936 --> 00:16:21,647 You did this last season, you’re like a suicide bomber!
- 00:16:21,647 --> 00:16:24,900 - Takes one to know one. - Yeah, well, you get it from him, not me.
- 00:16:24,900 --> 00:16:30,531 I don’t know him. You’re my grandpa, Rick. Rick and Morty. A hundred years.
- 00:16:30,864 --> 00:16:32,700 <i>This place totally might go up by the way.</i>
- 00:16:32,700 --> 00:16:35,869 <i>Here’s a bunch of countdowns? One of them’s probably accurate.</i>
- 00:16:38,372 --> 00:16:40,708 <i>Fuckin, stupid, 5th dimensional stomach juices.</i>
- 00:16:40,708 --> 00:16:43,961 <i>Sorry for the sitcom fight, and maybe getting us digested.</i>
- 00:16:43,961 --> 00:16:46,088 <i>- You’ve got incredible timing. - Don’t be a bitch,</i>
- 00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:48,257 <i>I’m parenting, makes sense you don’t recognize it,</i>
- 00:16:48,257 --> 00:16:50,175 <i>you’ve been out of practice for awhile.</i>
- 00:16:50,259 --> 00:16:53,262 <i>Good! I’m glad that they have you! I don’t want to be “Space Mom”.</i>
- 00:16:53,262 --> 00:16:54,513 <i>You’ve made that clear.</i>
- 00:16:54,513 --> 00:16:57,599 <i>Just don’t let Summer mistake your rejection of her for good taste.</i>
- 00:16:57,683 --> 00:16:59,852 <i>I'm not trying to, it's all her.</i>
- 00:17:03,689 --> 00:17:07,776 <i>Jesus. It’d be cool if you were around more, I don’t wanna get married.</i>
- 00:17:07,860 --> 00:17:11,655 <i>I’m seventeen. My affection is the wind, don’t try to compete for it.</i>
- 00:17:13,073 --> 00:17:15,284 <i>I could hear every word of that through the helmets.</i>
- 00:17:15,284 --> 00:17:17,077 <i>Thank fuck I only had to kill most of them.</i>
- 00:17:17,161 --> 00:17:18,954 <i>Jesus. That ship really has sailed.</i>
- 00:17:24,668 --> 00:17:27,755 And now we feast!
- 00:17:32,050 --> 00:17:33,802 This emergency was oversold to me.
- 00:17:33,886 --> 00:17:35,137 - Grandpa! Morty! - Moms!
- 00:17:35,763 --> 00:17:37,306 Wait, if they have to wear helmets...
- 00:17:37,306 --> 00:17:39,183 I do childproofing stuff while you’re asleep.
- 00:17:39,183 --> 00:17:40,768 Why don’t you childproof Dad?
- 00:17:40,768 --> 00:17:42,102 - Great reminder... - Wait!
- 00:17:42,186 --> 00:17:43,103 Time to get Jerry.
- 00:17:43,771 --> 00:17:46,857 Maybe I wouldn’t be so uptight if I wasn’t married to
- 00:17:46,857 --> 00:17:49,526 an unemployed receptacle of human fear!
- 00:17:49,610 --> 00:17:51,612 Get a job Dad, it’s been a decade.
- 00:17:51,612 --> 00:17:55,032 Pretty brutal Jer. I know a good alligator park if you wanna kill yourself.
- 00:17:55,616 --> 00:17:56,617 I got expelled today.
- 00:17:56,617 --> 00:17:59,119 Oh no, you got expelled. Whoa what a horrible thing.
- 00:17:59,203 --> 00:18:00,162 You are so fucking dumb.
- 00:18:00,537 --> 00:18:01,455 Hi hun.
- 00:18:02,915 --> 00:18:05,501 Some real Season 2 vibes in there, y’know what I’m sayin?
- 00:18:05,501 --> 00:18:07,544 You know, never thought I’d say this, but...
- 00:18:08,212 --> 00:18:10,464 I think I’m glad we spent that time divorced.
- 00:18:10,923 --> 00:18:11,799 One second...
- 00:18:11,799 --> 00:18:13,509 ...I’ll build af ucking swing set in the back yard?
- 00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:15,886 You know, I may technically be from here?
- 00:18:15,886 --> 00:18:18,597 But I’m a goddamn inter dimensional traveler now.
- 00:18:18,597 --> 00:18:21,809 And all of you can kiss my scifi ass.
- 00:18:28,106 --> 00:18:29,483 It gets me every time.
- 00:18:29,858 --> 00:18:34,613 Wow, what an amazing joke I just told. And also, what an adventure.
- 00:18:34,613 --> 00:18:37,616 Y’know I guess it doesn’t matter where we’re from, if we’re together, huh?
- 00:18:37,616 --> 00:18:39,284 Good, good final moral thing.
- 00:18:39,368 --> 00:18:41,787 This is everyone’s original dimension’ now.
- 00:18:41,787 --> 00:18:43,747 - Great wrap-ups, kids. - You’re back.
- 00:18:43,831 --> 00:18:46,750 - Oh shit), Season 2 Jerry! - Look, before you bust my balls,
- 00:18:46,834 --> 00:18:50,254 can someone help with the shower? It’s colder than Beth on our anniversary.
- 00:18:50,254 --> 00:18:52,548 Also... Look who I found in Rick’s room.
- 00:18:52,965 --> 00:18:54,383 I’m Mr. Frundles!
- 00:18:54,383 --> 00:18:57,803 I don’t care how cute he is, we agreed no boogens in the house.
- 00:18:57,803 --> 00:18:59,471 Wait, Season 2 Jerry, don’t!
- 00:18:59,555 --> 00:19:02,140 - Mr. Frundles! - Everybody in the car.
- 00:19:03,058 --> 00:19:04,560 I’m Mr. Frundles!
- 00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:07,688 - Wait but I thought HE was Mr. Frundles. - Everybody in the car!! Now!
- 00:19:09,815 --> 00:19:13,902 <i>I’m Mr. Frundles! I’m Mr. Frundles! I’m Mr. Frundles! I’m Mr. Frundles!</i>
- 00:19:16,238 --> 00:19:18,866 What thefuck, Dad? Why would you bring that thing into our house??
- 00:19:18,866 --> 00:19:21,702 It was cute! Fuck! We gotta find a new timeline now!
- 00:19:21,702 --> 00:19:23,912 You know how hard that shit is without portals?
- 00:19:23,996 --> 00:19:26,456 We gotta do the thing with the Rift and the beacon again!
- 00:19:26,540 --> 00:19:30,836 The whole fucking episode all over again. Car, fabricate some vomit bags.
- 00:19:30,836 --> 00:19:32,629 Can't we just go back and fix it?
- 00:19:34,256 --> 00:19:37,426 <i>I’m Mr. Frundles.</i>
- 00:19:40,596 --> 00:19:42,806 I can’t believe portal travel’s broken.
- 00:19:42,890 --> 00:19:45,517 - I’ll get to it when I get to it. - Lift with your knees, Mom.
- 00:19:45,601 --> 00:19:47,227 How many times have you done this?
- 00:19:49,563 --> 00:19:50,480 Oh god.
- 00:19:50,939 --> 00:19:54,443 - And you swear they die of natural causes. - Mhmm, yup.
- 00:19:54,443 --> 00:19:56,820 The exact same as our old timeline? Even my stuff?
- 00:19:56,904 --> 00:20:00,157 Bit of a rush job actually so they do say “parmesan” weird.
- 00:20:00,616 --> 00:20:02,326 - How do they say... - Par-mees-ian.
- 00:20:02,326 --> 00:20:03,660 - Jesus Christ. - This fucking sucks.
- 00:20:03,744 --> 00:20:06,747 I could’ve left you guys! You think the concept of “family” matters to me?
- 00:20:06,747 --> 00:20:07,748 I’m not even your Rick!
- 00:20:08,165 --> 00:20:10,042 - I’m Denial Rick!” - See you inside Dad.
- 00:20:11,001 --> 00:20:14,338 Sorry I was such a Dance Mom about Summer, she’s your daughter too.
- 00:20:14,338 --> 00:20:15,881 No, boundaries are good.
- 00:20:15,881 --> 00:20:18,926 But, speaking of maybe I've put up too many.
- 00:20:19,426 --> 00:20:22,346 - Is it Ok if I come around sometimes? - That could be nice.
- 00:20:22,763 --> 00:20:25,265 - That’s a cute outfit. - The one we always wear?
- 00:20:31,230 --> 00:20:34,232 - Yes Morty? - You promise I’m not, y’know, bait?
- 00:20:34,316 --> 00:20:36,818 - To make that Rick come back? - What? M-Morty,
- 00:20:36,902 --> 00:20:39,404 for you to be bait the guy'd have to value something,
- 00:20:39,988 --> 00:20:41,448 he truly does not give a shit.
- 00:20:43,283 --> 00:20:44,910 He's the real deal.
- 00:20:46,954 --> 00:20:51,041 - Parmeee-san. - Par-meees-ian. Par-mees-Ian.
- 00:20:51,041 --> 00:20:53,001 - Par, Parmeeeeeesian. - Parmesian.
- 00:20:53,085 --> 00:20:54,628 - Gross. I hate it. - Yeah.
- 00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:33,000 Hello? Morty? That one big rat?
- 00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:34,459 Whoa this is a development.
- 00:21:36,211 --> 00:21:38,005 Litle guy, easy. You’re a Jerry right?
- 00:21:38,005 --> 00:21:41,299 Never got too close to the concept. Boy you have really arc’d out.
- 00:21:41,383 --> 00:21:42,884 Were you putting on pants?
- 00:21:42,968 --> 00:21:45,429 What? Oh. Yeah. No, I was naked to fuck with a guy.
- 00:21:45,429 --> 00:21:48,932 Speaking of, did you talk to me, or a little kid around here?
- 00:21:49,266 --> 00:21:50,559 Maybe. Why?
- 00:21:51,226 --> 00:21:54,521 Because if you hate them too... I could be down for a little team up.
- 00:21:55,063 --> 00:21:58,066 I really don’t “team up” anymore. Managing people, such a headache...
- 00:21:59,317 --> 00:22:02,195 Fatality... Jerry wins!
- 00:22:07,784 --> 00:22:09,619 God damn dude. Bad ass!
- 00:22:12,998 --> 00:22:14,458 Why are you here?
- 00:22:14,458 --> 00:22:18,920 Buddy, I have been asking myself that exact same question.
- 00:00:07,132 --> 00:00:10,760 Наверно, так всё и заканчивается. Думал, я лучше этого.
- 00:00:10,844 --> 00:00:13,388 Драматическая озвучка застрявших в космосе?
- 00:00:13,471 --> 00:00:17,475 Наверно, когда умираешь, первой тебя покидает креативность.
- 00:00:17,559 --> 00:00:19,394 Цитадели больше нет.
- 00:00:19,477 --> 00:00:21,771 И тарелка, в которой мы сбежали, не работает.
- 00:00:22,105 --> 00:00:23,314 Блин, мне тут так страшно!
- 00:00:23,398 --> 00:00:25,108 Лишние Морти озверели.
- 00:00:26,443 --> 00:00:28,153 Некоторые проблемы решаются сами собой.
- 00:00:29,028 --> 00:00:30,280 Я много выпил…
- 00:00:30,363 --> 00:00:32,323 Морти, я же сказал тебе записать это.
- 00:00:32,407 --> 00:00:35,118 У меня нет шлема, как у того парня из Мстителей.
- 00:00:35,201 --> 00:00:37,287 Я выпил до фига собственной мочи.
- 00:00:37,370 --> 00:00:38,913 Портальная пушка еще сломана.
- 00:00:38,997 --> 00:00:41,082 Думаю, всё это - часть плана Злого Морти.
- 00:00:41,166 --> 00:00:43,585 «Злого Морти»? Может, хватит льстить этому парню?
- 00:00:43,668 --> 00:00:45,712 Он хотел произнести монолог и свалить.
- 00:00:45,795 --> 00:00:48,631 Закатил истерику, чтоб сказать, что уходит из «Твиттера».
- 00:00:48,715 --> 00:00:50,049 Никто не уходит из «Твиттера».
- 00:00:51,050 --> 00:00:53,011 Помнишь, как секунду назад ты сделал вид,
- 00:00:53,094 --> 00:00:55,388 что не знаешь, кто такой Железный Человек?
- 00:00:55,472 --> 00:00:56,931 Это ты для кого старался?
- 00:00:57,015 --> 00:01:00,935 Тише, Морти, так надо. Выноси испытания с достоинством.
- 00:01:01,019 --> 00:01:04,564 Спинной мозг, в основе «Робитуссин»… Давай, удиви меня.
- 00:01:15,116 --> 00:01:16,367 - Мама! - Может, Бет?
- 00:01:17,702 --> 00:01:19,329 Она пытается что-то сказать?
- 00:01:19,412 --> 00:01:20,705 Мы тебя не слышим!
- 00:01:21,289 --> 00:01:22,248 Какие тупые…
- 00:01:22,332 --> 00:01:25,043 Бет, ты в вакууме! Звук распространяется по воздуху!
- 00:01:25,126 --> 00:01:26,002 Зачем я кричу?
- 00:01:27,462 --> 00:01:29,589 ЭТО ЗАКРЫТАЯ ВЕЧЕРИНКА ИЛИ ЛЮБОЙ МОЖЕТ ЗАЙТИ?
- 00:01:29,672 --> 00:01:31,257 - Отлично. - Да, это…
- 00:01:31,341 --> 00:01:33,343 …правда того стоит. Это того не стоило!
- 00:01:33,426 --> 00:01:35,678 Это банально. Ты… кукуруза.
- 00:01:35,762 --> 00:01:37,889 Я тут умираю от голода!
- 00:01:37,972 --> 00:01:40,099 РЕШИВ СКАЗАТЬ ЭТО, Я НЕ ЗНАЛА, ЧТО МОИ СЛОВА…
- 00:01:40,183 --> 00:01:41,518 Боже… Хватит объяснять!
- 00:01:41,601 --> 00:01:42,602 Ты закончила?
- 00:01:42,685 --> 00:01:43,853 …БУДУТ ТАК ИЗУЧАТЬСЯ.
- 00:01:43,937 --> 00:01:44,813 Она не закончила.
- 00:01:44,896 --> 00:01:46,022 МОЖЕТ, Я НЕ БУДУ ВАС СПАСАТЬ.
- 00:01:46,105 --> 00:01:47,398 - Очень по-взрослому. - Здорово.
- 00:02:22,267 --> 00:02:23,476 Хорошо прокатились, дорогая.
- 00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:25,395 Мне это было не нужно. Плевать, что ты думаешь.
- 00:02:25,478 --> 00:02:26,604 Боже, она нашла тебя!
- 00:02:26,688 --> 00:02:28,398 - Вот, ешь. - Чёрт, да!
- 00:02:28,481 --> 00:02:31,109 Постой. Наши организмы могут испытать шок от твердой пищи.
- 00:02:31,192 --> 00:02:33,736 Пищевой бот, конвертируй в питательную массу.
- 00:02:42,871 --> 00:02:44,455 А я, пожалуй, рискну.
- 00:02:44,539 --> 00:02:46,875 И давно вы там застряли, ребята?
- 00:02:46,958 --> 00:02:49,002 - Кстати, спасибо. - Я чуть их не оставила.
- 00:02:49,085 --> 00:02:50,753 Портал для перемещений сломался.
- 00:02:50,837 --> 00:02:53,798 Это какие-то фамильные помидоры? Пищевой бот, попробуй.
- 00:02:53,882 --> 00:02:56,050 - Так вам больше не скакать по мирам? - Ням.
- 00:02:56,134 --> 00:02:58,052 То есть ты наконец постираешь свой халат?
- 00:02:58,136 --> 00:03:00,722 Хороший вопрос. Надо перезагрузить индекс портала.
- 00:03:01,848 --> 00:03:04,183 Полная перезагрузка жидкости, и всё.
- 00:03:04,267 --> 00:03:06,519 Держитесь крепче. Земля немного потрясется.
- 00:03:19,699 --> 00:03:21,492 - Чёрт. - Постой, что происходит?
- 00:03:21,576 --> 00:03:25,330 Я, похоже, перезагружал путешественников, а не портал.
- 00:03:25,413 --> 00:03:26,915 Поздно извиняться.
- 00:03:26,998 --> 00:03:29,125 Рик, почему я мигаю зеленым?
- 00:03:29,208 --> 00:03:31,419 И не говори, что не знаешь. Ты тоже мигаешь.
- 00:03:31,502 --> 00:03:32,712 Рик, мы скоро умрем?
- 00:03:32,795 --> 00:03:34,422 Нет, мы исчезнем из этой реальности.
- 00:03:34,505 --> 00:03:35,423 Так это и есть смерть.
- 00:03:35,506 --> 00:03:37,425 Нет. Просто все вернутся
- 00:03:37,508 --> 00:03:39,177 из этой реальности в первоначальную.
- 00:03:39,260 --> 00:03:40,845 Вернемся в изначальные вселенные?
- 00:03:40,929 --> 00:03:43,431 Я всё объяснил, Морти, всё разжевал.
- 00:03:43,514 --> 00:03:44,432 Где Саммер?
- 00:03:44,515 --> 00:03:45,767 Супер. Вы вернулись. Ого.
- 00:03:45,850 --> 00:03:47,936 Саммер, трое из нас прыгают вслепую.
- 00:03:48,019 --> 00:03:49,062 Ты поможешь нам вернуться.
- 00:03:49,145 --> 00:03:50,980 На твоем сервере есть протокол.
- 00:03:51,064 --> 00:03:53,608 - Файл «Сопли ВИЧ». - Они все там такие.
- 00:03:53,691 --> 00:03:54,734 Ненавижу давать названия.
- 00:03:54,817 --> 00:03:58,196 Просто найди слова «слепой прыжок», «сброс навигационного маяка».
- 00:03:58,279 --> 00:03:59,781 Откуда у меня изначальная реальность?
- 00:03:59,864 --> 00:04:01,950 Некогда объяснять. Саммер, полагаюсь на тебя.
- 00:04:02,033 --> 00:04:07,538 Протокол маяка слепого прыжка в одну сторону. Вот и всё!
- 00:04:10,458 --> 00:04:11,751 Итак, пора всё объяснить.
- 00:04:11,834 --> 00:04:14,462 Не трать драгоценные секунды на свою мелочность, Джерри.
- 00:04:14,545 --> 00:04:15,380 Саммер, давай…
- 00:04:15,463 --> 00:04:17,590 Слепой прыжок, сброс маяка, «Сопли ВИЧ».
- 00:04:17,674 --> 00:04:18,758 Круто.
- 00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:22,428 Масса времени, чтобы объяснить!
- 00:04:22,512 --> 00:04:24,180 Ладно. Задним умом все крепки.
- 00:04:24,264 --> 00:04:25,765 Кто же так долго исчезает?
- 00:04:25,848 --> 00:04:28,267 Как я оказался не в своей вселенной?
- 00:04:28,351 --> 00:04:30,019 Боже мой, Джеррибори.
- 00:04:30,895 --> 00:04:32,814 - Джеррибори. - Джеррибори. Глубоко.
- 00:04:35,108 --> 00:04:37,777 Постой, а где наш настоящий папа и настоящий Морти?
- 00:04:37,860 --> 00:04:39,362 Похоронены на заднем дворе.
- 00:04:39,445 --> 00:04:41,489 Это за ними охотятся опоссумы.
- 00:04:45,201 --> 00:04:47,453 Папа тебя тоже втянул в семейный бизнес?
- 00:04:47,537 --> 00:04:51,249 Да, Морти - легкая добыча. Но Рик платит мне такими вещами, как…
- 00:04:51,332 --> 00:04:53,251 Когти росомахи.
- 00:04:53,334 --> 00:04:56,546 Что ж, похоже, ты поняла. Увидимся еще через два года.
- 00:04:56,629 --> 00:04:58,881 А можешь остаться и посмотреть.
- 00:04:58,965 --> 00:05:00,842 Похоже, тут замешана поганая Цитадель деда.
- 00:05:00,925 --> 00:05:02,969 Можно что-нибудь сломать, прикарманить.
- 00:05:03,052 --> 00:05:06,973 Я, пожалуй, вернусь к спасению галактики.
- 00:05:07,056 --> 00:05:08,391 Ну пожалуйста!
- 00:05:09,225 --> 00:05:11,811 Можно и присвоить что-нибудь. Ладно, давайте быстрее.
- 00:05:11,894 --> 00:05:14,063 Чудесно. Я там ни разу не была. За дело.
- 00:05:14,147 --> 00:05:15,940 Семья, жаждущая приключений!
- 00:05:17,608 --> 00:05:18,609 Ладно.
- 00:05:23,364 --> 00:05:24,282 Твою мать!
- 00:05:29,996 --> 00:05:32,957 Пардон. Братишка, Рик сюда не проходит.
- 00:05:35,752 --> 00:05:37,712 Рик, это ты?
- 00:05:37,795 --> 00:05:39,505 Да, Дайан.
- 00:05:39,589 --> 00:05:41,299 Тебя так долго не было!
- 00:05:41,382 --> 00:05:43,134 Ты нашел убийцу нашей дочери?
- 00:05:43,217 --> 00:05:44,260 Еще нет. Прости.
- 00:05:44,343 --> 00:05:46,054 - Еще ищу. - Ты найдешь его!
- 00:05:46,137 --> 00:05:49,223 Ты всегда делаешь то, что задумал!
- 00:05:49,307 --> 00:05:51,017 Кроме сохранения жизни членов своей семьи.
- 00:05:51,100 --> 00:05:52,560 Но вряд ли это была твоя вина.
- 00:05:52,643 --> 00:05:53,853 Немой режим.
- 00:05:53,936 --> 00:05:55,897 Если бы меня можно было заткнуть,
- 00:05:55,980 --> 00:05:59,358 я вряд ли могла бы тебя преследовать, да, грязный медведь?
- 00:05:59,442 --> 00:06:01,152 А я, типа, хотел, чтоб меня преследовали.
- 00:06:01,235 --> 00:06:02,737 Возможно, ты этого ожидал.
- 00:06:02,820 --> 00:06:04,947 Тут преследование очень кстати.
- 00:06:05,031 --> 00:06:06,699 Хорошая мысль, солнышко.
- 00:06:13,873 --> 00:06:14,791 Рик!
- 00:06:18,419 --> 00:06:20,713 Привет, первоначальная семья!
- 00:06:20,797 --> 00:06:22,090 Извините за прошлый раз.
- 00:06:22,173 --> 00:06:24,175 Рик был в космической тюрьме.
- 00:06:24,258 --> 00:06:26,260 Мы не могли просто… Эй!
- 00:06:35,061 --> 00:06:35,937 Боже…
- 00:06:52,453 --> 00:06:55,164 «ДАЙДЖЕСТ ЗАВОДЧИКОВ», «ПОВТОРЯЮЩИЙСЯ СТОЯК», «СЕКС-ВОГ»
- 00:06:59,043 --> 00:07:02,088 Твою мать. Блин, Морти, врачей больше нет.
- 00:07:02,171 --> 00:07:03,381 Папа?
- 00:07:06,759 --> 00:07:08,886 Как по мне, вид тут так себе.
- 00:07:08,970 --> 00:07:12,432 Прости уж. Обычно тут ковбой Рик, Морти и всё такое.
- 00:07:13,224 --> 00:07:16,936 Похоже, Рику и Морти не помешало бы завести ремонтников, верно?
- 00:07:17,019 --> 00:07:18,896 Спокойно. Мелкие мусорщики.
- 00:07:18,980 --> 00:07:20,773 Если они на нас нападут, мне можно…
- 00:07:21,649 --> 00:07:23,985 …сделать вот так. Чёрт, да!
- 00:07:27,029 --> 00:07:28,656 Космическая мама, займись этим!
- 00:07:32,785 --> 00:07:33,786 Крутая мама.
- 00:07:33,870 --> 00:07:35,663 Пошли дальше. Не весь день же тут торчать.
- 00:07:36,789 --> 00:07:37,623 Я разберусь.
- 00:07:39,792 --> 00:07:41,544 Я разберусь.
- 00:07:41,627 --> 00:07:42,503 Извините.
- 00:07:43,337 --> 00:07:44,297 Извините.
- 00:07:44,380 --> 00:07:46,090 Я разберусь, извините!
- 00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:49,635 Я сама собиралась…
- 00:07:50,178 --> 00:07:52,138 Земляне, я права?
- 00:07:52,471 --> 00:07:54,724 Я продолжала поиски в твое отсутствие.
- 00:07:54,807 --> 00:07:56,809 Дать новый список потенциальных мест?
- 00:07:56,893 --> 00:07:59,353 Ты всегда в соседней комнате, да?
- 00:07:59,437 --> 00:08:00,897 Да, помнишь?
- 00:08:00,980 --> 00:08:05,151 Ты думал, тебе будет приятно видеть меня, прикасаться ко мне…
- 00:08:05,234 --> 00:08:06,861 Верно. Но - увы.
- 00:08:06,944 --> 00:08:08,112 Давай же, Саммер.
- 00:08:08,196 --> 00:08:10,448 Кто такая Саммер? У меня есть повод для ревности?
- 00:08:10,531 --> 00:08:13,784 Надеюсь, Саммер знает, что происходит с теми, кого ты любишь.
- 00:08:18,581 --> 00:08:21,667 - Привет, Рик. - Привет, м-р Голдманбахмаджориан.
- 00:08:21,751 --> 00:08:23,628 Вы еще живы? Как дела?
- 00:08:23,711 --> 00:08:28,132 Хотел попросить вас помочь мне понять записку, которую я нашел сегодня утром.
- 00:08:28,216 --> 00:08:31,344 Ее написал кто-то, выдающий себя за меня.
- 00:08:31,427 --> 00:08:34,472 Тут написано, что мой разум - в плену, во временной петле.
- 00:08:34,555 --> 00:08:38,893 Он попал в ловушку в трагический день, в результате агонии жуткого интеллекта.
- 00:08:38,976 --> 00:08:41,187 Но мой поработитель забыл о старении,
- 00:08:41,270 --> 00:08:43,940 о том, что мое тело портится и жаждет смерти,
- 00:08:44,023 --> 00:08:48,069 а моя душа застряла в одном месте, как муха в янтаре.
- 00:08:48,152 --> 00:08:50,738 Точно. Напитки же надо пить, а не жевать.
- 00:08:50,821 --> 00:08:52,740 - Без понятия, дружище. - Ничего.
- 00:08:52,823 --> 00:08:54,992 Я нашел в мусоре и другие похожие записки.
- 00:08:55,076 --> 00:08:56,911 Бедный чудак. Мне его жаль.
- 00:08:56,994 --> 00:08:58,538 Вот бы он освободился!
- 00:08:58,621 --> 00:09:00,373 - Звучит здраво. - А то!
- 00:09:05,044 --> 00:09:06,504 Сладкая смерть…
- 00:09:06,837 --> 00:09:09,590 Ну разве не символично? Отпускаешь?
- 00:09:09,674 --> 00:09:11,884 Понимаю, милый. Я прощаю тебя.
- 00:09:11,968 --> 00:09:13,928 Ты не должна так говорить! Ты - не она!
- 00:09:14,011 --> 00:09:16,222 Ты - вещь, которую я создал, чтоб мучить себя.
- 00:09:16,305 --> 00:09:18,266 Вся эта чертова временная шкала проклята.
- 00:09:18,349 --> 00:09:20,935 - Надо выбираться отсюда. - Ты хочешь идти дальше.
- 00:09:21,018 --> 00:09:22,436 Не хочу!
- 00:09:22,520 --> 00:09:23,938 Но надо.
- 00:09:24,230 --> 00:09:25,898 Я вернулся случайно.
- 00:09:25,982 --> 00:09:29,068 Того, кого я ищу, невозможно найти, Дайан.
- 00:09:30,611 --> 00:09:32,822 Теперь я живу с версией Бет.
- 00:09:32,905 --> 00:09:34,740 Похоже, версия неплохая.
- 00:09:34,824 --> 00:09:37,326 У нас есть внуки. Это как раз Саммер.
- 00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:38,995 Она вытащит меня отсюда.
- 00:09:39,078 --> 00:09:40,246 Она напоминает мне тебя.
- 00:09:40,329 --> 00:09:42,415 Правда? Она тоже умерла?
- 00:09:43,165 --> 00:09:44,333 Пока, Дайан.
- 00:09:44,417 --> 00:09:47,753 Ты же не собираешься лететь в то ущелье без координат?
- 00:09:47,837 --> 00:09:49,338 Не отказывайся от нас, Рик!
- 00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:52,216 Не я устанавливаю правила. Призраки продолжат преследовать.
- 00:09:58,431 --> 00:10:00,891 Милый, ты собираешься себя убить?
- 00:10:00,975 --> 00:10:04,145 Склоняюсь к варианту победить, рискнув жизнью.
- 00:10:13,154 --> 00:10:14,614 Где мама и Саммер?
- 00:10:14,697 --> 00:10:16,741 Их больше нет. Мне жаль, Морти.
- 00:10:16,824 --> 00:10:17,783 Совсем нет?
- 00:10:17,867 --> 00:10:20,161 Мы много времени провели во льду.
- 00:10:20,244 --> 00:10:21,996 Нежный мутант вылизывал нас.
- 00:10:22,079 --> 00:10:25,124 Но Бет заболела, а Саммер неправильно оттаяла.
- 00:10:26,751 --> 00:10:29,712 Винить было некого, и я стал жить в одиночестве.
- 00:10:29,795 --> 00:10:31,672 Я утопил свое горе в книгах.
- 00:10:31,756 --> 00:10:35,634 «Четыре соглашения», «Ешь, молись, люби», комиксы Миллера…
- 00:10:35,718 --> 00:10:37,970 Я научился принимать вещи такими, какие они есть.
- 00:10:38,888 --> 00:10:41,724 У некоторых из них мозг не поврежден.
- 00:10:41,807 --> 00:10:45,561 Это заставляет задуматься, выжили ли другие люди, охваченные ужасом.
- 00:10:45,644 --> 00:10:47,313 Ну да ладно. Это чудесный протеин.
- 00:10:47,396 --> 00:10:48,439 Мне очень жаль, пап,
- 00:10:48,522 --> 00:10:52,151 но мой настоящий, изначальный отец победил апокалипсис.
- 00:10:52,443 --> 00:10:54,695 Думаю, мы все тебя недооценивали.
- 00:10:55,196 --> 00:10:58,324 Эй, в какую игру мы часто играли всей семьей?
- 00:10:58,407 --> 00:11:00,242 - Бесконечная такая. - «Даунбит».
- 00:11:00,326 --> 00:11:02,828 Давай в нее сыграем. Уверен, я найду ее.
- 00:11:02,912 --> 00:11:06,499 - Доиграем до конца. - Ага. Обязательно.
- 00:11:10,252 --> 00:11:11,545 «ДАУНБИТ», ВЕЧНОЕ УДОВОЛЬСТВИЕ
- 00:11:11,629 --> 00:11:13,172 Я ее нашел. Мы сыграем,
- 00:11:13,255 --> 00:11:16,217 переночуем сегодня здесь, а потом восстановим дом.
- 00:11:16,634 --> 00:11:20,304 У нас есть еда, пресная вода и семья.
- 00:11:20,763 --> 00:11:21,889 Твою мать!
- 00:11:23,891 --> 00:11:25,684 «Морти, я написал эту записку заранее -
- 00:11:25,768 --> 00:11:27,645 вдруг тебе интересно, почему я так быстро ушел.
- 00:11:27,728 --> 00:11:29,438 Я хотел, чтобы ты отвернулся,
- 00:11:29,522 --> 00:11:31,482 а я смог схватить твое барахло и свалить.
- 00:11:31,565 --> 00:11:33,067 Сколько ты пробыл в комнате?
- 00:11:33,150 --> 00:11:35,653 Возможно, ты решишь, что я не мог далеко уйти,
- 00:11:35,736 --> 00:11:36,862 и захочешь…»
- 00:11:39,824 --> 00:11:41,534 «Морти, я торопился - делал ловушку.
- 00:11:41,617 --> 00:11:43,244 Думал, у тебя вещи покруче. Ищи записку».
- 00:11:43,327 --> 00:11:44,161 Твою…
- 00:11:44,908 --> 00:11:46,952 Тормози!
- 00:11:47,035 --> 00:11:47,953 Так плохо!
- 00:11:49,079 --> 00:11:51,957 - Какого чёрта, пап? - Ничего личного, Морти.
- 00:11:52,040 --> 00:11:53,250 Это одно из четырех соглашений.
- 00:11:53,333 --> 00:11:54,376 Не помню трех других,
- 00:11:54,459 --> 00:11:57,129 но знаю, что комиссар Гордон был не против ухода Бэтмена.
- 00:11:57,212 --> 00:12:00,173 - Бэтмен не бросает людей! - Но ты же нас бросил.
- 00:12:00,632 --> 00:12:01,716 Я заслужил это.
- 00:12:01,800 --> 00:12:03,760 Но это… улучшило тебя.
- 00:12:04,678 --> 00:12:06,346 Так теперь я, по-твоему, крут?
- 00:12:06,429 --> 00:12:09,516 Это было легко, просто стоило мне всего, твою мать.
- 00:12:09,599 --> 00:12:10,475 Я…
- 00:12:10,559 --> 00:12:13,436 Ты вернулся и говорил о нас, как будто мы не люди, Морти!
- 00:12:13,520 --> 00:12:15,272 Ты сбежал и оставил нас замерзать.
- 00:12:15,355 --> 00:12:19,234 - Я за это уже извинился. - Твоя мама и сестра умерли, Морти!
- 00:12:20,861 --> 00:12:23,780 А я покончил с заботой о близких,
- 00:12:23,864 --> 00:12:26,491 и это лучшее, чего можно было пожелать.
- 00:12:26,575 --> 00:12:28,743 - Вот так-то. - Прошу, не уходи!
- 00:12:28,827 --> 00:12:31,621 Если Рик вернется, мы найдем тебе новую реальность,
- 00:12:31,705 --> 00:12:34,249 новую маму, новую Саммер, работу.
- 00:12:34,875 --> 00:12:36,126 Ты не понимаешь, малыш.
- 00:12:36,209 --> 00:12:38,545 За исключением этого разговора, моя жизнь прекрасна.
- 00:12:38,628 --> 00:12:40,046 Рик всегда был прав.
- 00:12:40,130 --> 00:12:41,923 Нельзя никого удерживать.
- 00:12:47,470 --> 00:12:48,555 Ты вернулся!
- 00:12:48,638 --> 00:12:50,557 Похоже, мы друг к другу привязались.
- 00:12:51,016 --> 00:12:53,602 Перестань! Отстань! Помогите!
- 00:12:54,644 --> 00:12:56,813 Так, дед, погнали.
- 00:12:56,897 --> 00:12:58,023 Давай, достань нас!
- 00:13:00,525 --> 00:13:01,902 Давай же!
- 00:13:01,985 --> 00:13:04,237 Милый, помни вот что:
- 00:13:04,487 --> 00:13:06,615 если ты по какой-то причине попал домой,
- 00:13:06,698 --> 00:13:09,075 то мы, вероятно, этого и хотели.
- 00:13:09,409 --> 00:13:12,871 Не менее вероятно, что ему так же сложно улететь, как и тебе.
- 00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:15,790 Он в ловушке.
- 00:13:17,375 --> 00:13:19,544 - Дед! - Твою мать, да!
- 00:13:24,132 --> 00:13:25,217 Дед!
- 00:13:25,300 --> 00:13:27,510 Саммер! Золото мое! Я всегда в тебя верил.
- 00:13:27,594 --> 00:13:29,054 - А теперь самое трудное. - Трудное?
- 00:13:29,137 --> 00:13:31,139 Этот маяк видят существа гораздо ужаснее меня.
- 00:13:31,223 --> 00:13:33,725 Затаись и охраняй его, а я заберу Морти.
- 00:13:33,808 --> 00:13:36,144 - Постарайся выжить. - Чёрт.
- 00:13:36,478 --> 00:13:39,272 - Домашней маме надо спрятаться. - «Домашней маме»?
- 00:13:39,356 --> 00:13:40,899 Она, конечно, крутой космонавт…
- 00:13:40,982 --> 00:13:43,735 Что бы это ни было, им меня не поймать.
- 00:13:43,818 --> 00:13:45,362 Может, вы спрячетесь и всё обсудите?
- 00:13:45,445 --> 00:13:48,657 Не говори свысока. Я - это ты, только у меня хватает терпения на стирку.
- 00:13:48,740 --> 00:13:50,700 Мам, хватит завидовать нашей связи.
- 00:13:50,784 --> 00:13:53,245 Она сбежала от нашего выбора. Я должна их воспитать.
- 00:13:53,328 --> 00:13:56,289 Не то чтобы мне было всё равно. Для этого и создают клонов.
- 00:13:57,582 --> 00:13:58,750 Мама!
- 00:14:12,305 --> 00:14:13,682 - Морти! - Рик!
- 00:14:13,765 --> 00:14:16,184 Я знал! Знал, что ты не бросишь меня.
- 00:14:16,268 --> 00:14:17,435 Твою мать.
- 00:14:17,519 --> 00:14:19,229 Морти, ты видел здесь другого Рика?
- 00:14:19,312 --> 00:14:21,398 Невзрачная прическа, странная куртка.
- 00:14:21,481 --> 00:14:23,608 Конечно, ты его не видел, иначе был бы мертв.
- 00:14:23,692 --> 00:14:24,901 Или был бы бомбой.
- 00:14:25,318 --> 00:14:26,611 Ты ощущаешь себя бомбой?
- 00:14:27,153 --> 00:14:29,739 - Ты бы уже взорвался. - Разве Рик здесь не мертв?
- 00:14:29,823 --> 00:14:31,616 Вот почему ты выбираешь места, да?
- 00:14:32,534 --> 00:14:35,203 Ну, твой Рик… Да, он не умер.
- 00:14:35,287 --> 00:14:36,413 Наверно, он далеко.
- 00:14:36,496 --> 00:14:39,165 Встретив тебя, я ждал, что однажды он объявится.
- 00:14:39,249 --> 00:14:40,875 Сукин сын, я тебя поймаю!
- 00:14:41,376 --> 00:14:44,588 - Куда мы едем? - Убивать твоего деда, дружок.
- 00:14:44,671 --> 00:14:45,672 Постой, что?
- 00:14:46,256 --> 00:14:49,509 Не понимаю. Мой настоящий Рик убил твою семью?
- 00:14:49,593 --> 00:14:51,094 И ты ждал, что он вернется?
- 00:14:51,177 --> 00:14:54,014 Похоже, ты прекрасно всё понимаешь, Морти.
- 00:14:54,097 --> 00:14:55,223 Мы приехали.
- 00:14:57,559 --> 00:15:00,770 Он не хочет, чтобы его нашли, но обожает создавать изощренные штуки.
- 00:15:00,854 --> 00:15:03,690 Как будто играешь в «Майнкрафт», но на частном сервере.
- 00:15:03,773 --> 00:15:06,484 Я в какой-то глючной дыре? Что происходит?
- 00:15:10,572 --> 00:15:11,740 Вы меня нашли!
- 00:15:13,450 --> 00:15:14,909 Первый монитор я тоже разбил.
- 00:15:14,993 --> 00:15:17,954 Слушайте, меня здесь нет. Или есть?
- 00:15:18,747 --> 00:15:21,583 Вы нашли клона. А может, это я, просто голый.
- 00:15:21,666 --> 00:15:23,376 Эдакий Кайзер Созе.
- 00:15:23,460 --> 00:15:25,086 Я к тому, что зачем отрицать?
- 00:15:25,170 --> 00:15:27,213 Гляньте-ка на него. Смотрите, как он ходит.
- 00:15:27,297 --> 00:15:28,965 А как он танцует! Или я.
- 00:15:29,049 --> 00:15:30,342 Опять же: возможно, это я.
- 00:15:30,425 --> 00:15:32,844 Как в фильме «Пила». Я очень хитер.
- 00:15:32,927 --> 00:15:36,056 Тут куча робоубийц. Займитесь ими, пока размышляете.
- 00:15:40,518 --> 00:15:42,312 Вообще-то, я даже не знаю, с кем сейчас говорю.
- 00:15:42,395 --> 00:15:43,480 Эта речь записана заранее.
- 00:15:45,565 --> 00:15:48,777 Но раз вы забрались так далеко, то, наверно, считаете себя особенными.
- 00:15:48,860 --> 00:15:49,819 А знаете что?
- 00:15:50,070 --> 00:15:52,614 Вон он! Возможно, это действительно я.
- 00:15:52,697 --> 00:15:55,241 И если вы прыгнете за ним, мы сможем помериться силами.
- 00:15:55,325 --> 00:15:57,243 Шанс, что я не лгу - 50%.
- 00:15:58,912 --> 00:16:01,956 У нас проблемы, придурок. Я не должна умолять.
- 00:16:02,040 --> 00:16:03,541 Постой! Мамы в беде.
- 00:16:03,625 --> 00:16:05,669 - Те их версии. - Мы должны спасти их!
- 00:16:05,752 --> 00:16:07,420 Рик, это же явно ловушка!
- 00:16:07,504 --> 00:16:09,172 Прыгнешь туда - и он тебя убьет!
- 00:16:09,255 --> 00:16:10,840 - Хорошо. - Что?
- 00:16:12,717 --> 00:16:13,802 Что еще?
- 00:16:13,885 --> 00:16:16,221 Тебе плевать, если ты умрешь. Тогда могу умереть и я.
- 00:16:16,304 --> 00:16:19,140 Брось. Убирайся отсюда. Ты сделал это в прошлом сезоне.
- 00:16:19,224 --> 00:16:21,643 - Ты как смертник. - От смертника слышу.
- 00:16:21,726 --> 00:16:23,895 Да уж, это у тебя от него, не от меня.
- 00:16:23,978 --> 00:16:25,313 Я с ним не знаком.
- 00:16:25,397 --> 00:16:27,607 Рик, мой дедушка - ты.
- 00:16:27,690 --> 00:16:29,567 Рик и Морти. Сто лет.
- 00:16:29,651 --> 00:16:31,528 Кстати, это место может взлететь на воздух.
- 00:16:31,611 --> 00:16:34,948 Вот несколько обратных отсчетов. Один из них, вероятно, точный.
- 00:16:37,158 --> 00:16:39,703 Гребаный тупой пятимерный желудочный сок!
- 00:16:39,786 --> 00:16:42,747 Извини за драку в стиле ситкома и за то, что нас, возможно, переварили.
- 00:16:42,831 --> 00:16:44,165 У тебя крутое чувство времени.
- 00:16:44,249 --> 00:16:45,750 Не будь сукой. Я воспитываю детей.
- 00:16:45,834 --> 00:16:47,210 Похоже, тебе это не знакомо.
- 00:16:47,293 --> 00:16:48,711 Давно не тренировалась, да?
- 00:16:48,795 --> 00:16:52,173 Хорошо. Я рада, что у них есть ты. Не хочу быть Космической мамой.
- 00:16:52,257 --> 00:16:53,299 Всё предельно ясно.
- 00:16:53,383 --> 00:16:56,219 Но не позволяй Саммер принять твой отказ за хороший вкус.
- 00:16:56,302 --> 00:16:58,555 Я и не пытаюсь. Это всё она.
- 00:17:02,684 --> 00:17:05,061 Боже, вот бы вы почаще были рядом!
- 00:17:05,145 --> 00:17:06,563 Я не хочу выходить замуж.
- 00:17:06,646 --> 00:17:10,608 Мне 17 лет. Я люблю ветер. Не пытайся соперничать за него.
- 00:17:11,860 --> 00:17:13,987 Мне всё слышно даже в шлеме.
- 00:17:14,070 --> 00:17:15,989 Слава богу, что я убила только их.
- 00:17:16,072 --> 00:17:18,241 Боже. Тот корабль реально улетел.
- 00:17:23,455 --> 00:17:26,499 А теперь - пируем!
- 00:17:31,004 --> 00:17:32,797 - Этот форс-мажор перепоручили мне. - Дед!
- 00:17:32,881 --> 00:17:34,382 - Морти! - Мамочки!
- 00:17:34,466 --> 00:17:36,050 Постой… Раз они надели шлемы…
- 00:17:36,134 --> 00:17:37,969 Я создаю защиту от детей, пока ты спишь.
- 00:17:38,052 --> 00:17:39,554 А почему ты папу от детей не защищаешь?
- 00:17:39,637 --> 00:17:41,973 - Хорошо, что напомнил. Вытащим Джерри. - Постой…
- 00:17:42,432 --> 00:17:44,476 Может, я не была бы так напряжена,
- 00:17:44,559 --> 00:17:48,396 не будь я замужем за безработным вместилищем человеческого страха.
- 00:17:48,480 --> 00:17:51,483 - Пап, найди работу. Сколько можно! - Это жесткач, Джерри.
- 00:17:51,566 --> 00:17:54,444 Я знаю хороший парк аллигаторов, если захочешь покончить с собой.
- 00:17:54,527 --> 00:17:56,446 - Меня сегодня исключили. - Какого чёрта, Морти?
- 00:17:56,529 --> 00:17:59,282 - Тебя исключили? Ты чертовски туп. - Его исключили. Какой ужас!
- 00:17:59,365 --> 00:18:00,200 Привет, дорогой.
- 00:18:00,867 --> 00:18:04,329 Чувствуется атмосфера второго сезона. Понимаешь, о чём я?
- 00:18:04,412 --> 00:18:06,956 Знаешь что? Не думал, что когда-нибудь это скажу, но…
- 00:18:07,040 --> 00:18:09,626 Я, пожалуй, рад тому времени, что мы провели в разводе.
- 00:18:09,709 --> 00:18:11,085 Секундочку.
- 00:18:11,169 --> 00:18:14,756 - …качели на заднем дворе. - Формально я, возможно, отсюда,
- 00:18:14,839 --> 00:18:17,342 но теперь я - гребаный межпространственный путешественник.
- 00:18:17,425 --> 00:18:20,470 Так что пошли вы все в задницу!
- 00:18:26,976 --> 00:18:28,478 Меня каждый раз пробирает.
- 00:18:28,686 --> 00:18:31,272 А классный анекдот я рассказал!
- 00:18:31,356 --> 00:18:33,399 А какое это было приключение!
- 00:18:33,483 --> 00:18:36,319 Наверно, неважно, откуда мы, - главное, мы вместе, да?
- 00:18:36,402 --> 00:18:38,112 Чудесная мораль в конце.
- 00:18:38,196 --> 00:18:40,448 Теперь это исходное измерение для всех нас.
- 00:18:40,532 --> 00:18:42,659 - Отличный результат, дети! - Вы вернулись?
- 00:18:42,742 --> 00:18:44,410 Чёрт. Джерри из второго сезона.
- 00:18:44,494 --> 00:18:46,996 Прежде чем катить на меня бочку, может, с душем поможете?
- 00:18:47,080 --> 00:18:49,040 В нём вода холоднее, чем Бет в нашу годовщину.
- 00:18:49,123 --> 00:18:51,543 А еще… Смотрите, что я нашел у Рика в комнате.
- 00:18:51,793 --> 00:18:54,546 - Я м-р Франдлс. - Меня не волнует, насколько он мил, -
- 00:18:54,629 --> 00:18:57,674 - был уговор: нет бугенам в доме! - Джерри из второго сезона, не надо!
- 00:18:58,258 --> 00:19:00,844 - М-р Франдлс. - Все в машину!
- 00:19:01,844 --> 00:19:03,263 Я м-р Франдлс.
- 00:19:03,346 --> 00:19:05,139 Стоп. Я думал, это м-р Франдлс.
- 00:19:05,223 --> 00:19:06,850 Все в машину, немедленно!
- 00:19:08,560 --> 00:19:10,728 - Я м-р Франдлс. - Я м-р Франдлс.
- 00:19:14,983 --> 00:19:17,527 Какого хрена, пап? Зачем ты принес эту штуку в наш дом?
- 00:19:17,610 --> 00:19:19,070 Он был такой хорошенький! Твою мать.
- 00:19:19,153 --> 00:19:20,697 Теперь надо найти новую временную шкалу.
- 00:19:20,780 --> 00:19:22,574 Знаешь, как это сложно без порталов?
- 00:19:22,657 --> 00:19:25,159 Придется опять повторять эту возню с ущельем и маяком.
- 00:19:25,243 --> 00:19:27,245 Весь гребаный эпизод заново.
- 00:19:27,328 --> 00:19:29,414 Машина, сделай пакеты для рвоты.
- 00:19:29,497 --> 00:19:31,499 А нельзя вернуться и просто всё исправить?
- 00:19:32,959 --> 00:19:36,462 Я м-р Франдлс!
- 00:19:39,257 --> 00:19:41,634 Не могу поверить, что портал сломан.
- 00:19:41,718 --> 00:19:43,052 Я починю его, когда руки дойдут.
- 00:19:43,136 --> 00:19:46,097 - Подними колени, мам. - Сколько раз ты это делал?
- 00:19:48,141 --> 00:19:52,145 - Боже. - Говоришь, они сами умирают?
- 00:19:52,228 --> 00:19:55,064 - Да. - Всё как в нашей временной шкале?
- 00:19:55,148 --> 00:19:56,858 - Даже мои вещи? - Надо торопиться.
- 00:19:56,941 --> 00:19:59,319 Так вот, они очень странно говорят «пармезан».
- 00:19:59,402 --> 00:20:01,070 - Как они говорят… - «Пар-ми-сян».
- 00:20:01,946 --> 00:20:05,325 Я мог бы бросить вас, ребята. Думаете, семья для меня что-то значит?
- 00:20:05,408 --> 00:20:06,451 Я даже не ваш Рик!
- 00:20:06,910 --> 00:20:09,287 - Я Отрицающий Рик. - Увидимся в доме, пап.
- 00:20:09,370 --> 00:20:11,956 Извини, что я была такой Танцевальной мамой в отношении Саммер.
- 00:20:12,040 --> 00:20:14,417 - Она и твоя дочь тоже. - Нет, границы в порядке.
- 00:20:14,500 --> 00:20:18,087 Кстати, о границах: возможно, я установила их слишком много.
- 00:20:18,171 --> 00:20:21,215 - Ничего, если я буду иногда приходить? - Было бы неплохо.
- 00:20:21,299 --> 00:20:24,093 - Милый наряд. - Повседневная одежда?
- 00:20:29,932 --> 00:20:30,975 Слушаю, Морти.
- 00:20:31,059 --> 00:20:34,395 Ты клянешься, что я не приманка, чтобы тот Рик вернулся?
- 00:20:34,479 --> 00:20:37,899 Что? Морти, чтобы ты был приманкой, тот мужик должен дорожить тобой.
- 00:20:37,982 --> 00:20:40,109 Ему действительно плевать.
- 00:20:42,028 --> 00:20:43,613 Настоящий мужик.
- 00:20:45,490 --> 00:20:47,992 - Пар-ми-син. - Пар-ми-сян.
- 00:20:48,076 --> 00:20:50,787 - Пар-ми-сян. - Пар-ми-сян.
- 00:20:50,870 --> 00:20:53,122 - Пар-ми-сян. Да. - Фу, звучит ужасно.
- 00:21:28,574 --> 00:21:31,536 Эй! Морти? Та большая крыса?
- 00:21:31,619 --> 00:21:32,912 Вот это эволюция!
- 00:21:33,454 --> 00:21:36,499 Ого, малыш! Спокойно. Ты Джерри, верно?
- 00:21:36,582 --> 00:21:38,084 Никогда я не был так близок к концепции.
- 00:21:38,167 --> 00:21:39,961 Да ты и вправду выбился из колеи.
- 00:21:40,044 --> 00:21:41,421 Ты надел штаны?
- 00:21:41,504 --> 00:21:44,007 Что? Да. Нет, я был голый, чтоб облапошить того мужика.
- 00:21:44,090 --> 00:21:47,844 Кстати, о мужике: ты говорил тут со мной или с ребенком?
- 00:21:47,927 --> 00:21:49,721 Всё может быть. А что?
- 00:21:49,804 --> 00:21:53,141 Просто если ты тоже их ненавидишь, мы могли бы объединиться.
- 00:21:53,224 --> 00:21:54,726 Я больше ни с кем не объединяюсь.
- 00:21:54,809 --> 00:21:56,602 Контроль за людьми - сплошная головная боль.
- 00:21:57,854 --> 00:22:00,898 Фатально. Джерри победил.
- 00:22:06,279 --> 00:22:08,239 Блин, чувак. Ну ты и крут!
- 00:22:11,701 --> 00:22:13,077 Зачем ты сюда явился?
- 00:22:13,161 --> 00:22:17,665 Дружище, я задавал себе точно такой же вопрос.
- 00:22:17,749 --> 00:22:19,208 СВЕТЛОЙ ПАМЯТИ МАЙКА МЕНДЕЛА
- 00:00:06,548 --> 00:00:08,633 Rick: <i>Ugh, guess this is how it ends.</i>
- 00:00:08,717 --> 00:00:10,218 <i>I thought I was better than this.</i>
- 00:00:10,218 --> 00:00:13,138 <i>Dramatic voiceover while stranded in space?</i>
- 00:00:13,138 --> 00:00:14,639 <i>I-I guess when you're dying,</i>
- 00:00:14,723 --> 00:00:17,308 <i>the first thing to go is your creativity.</i>
- 00:00:17,392 --> 00:00:19,185 <i>Citadel's gone...</i>
- 00:00:19,269 --> 00:00:21,855 <i>and-- and the saucer we escaped in is out of power...</i>
- 00:00:21,855 --> 00:00:23,314 Aw, man, I'm so scared in here.
- 00:00:23,398 --> 00:00:24,899 Rick: <i>The extra Mortys went feral.</i>
- 00:00:24,983 --> 00:00:26,234 [ Morty screams ]
- 00:00:26,234 --> 00:00:28,778 <i>Eh, some problems solve themselves.</i>
- 00:00:28,862 --> 00:00:30,238 Been drinking a lot.
- 00:00:30,238 --> 00:00:31,990 Morty! I told you to write this down!
- 00:00:31,990 --> 00:00:35,076 I-I don't have a helmet like that Avengers guy did.
- 00:00:35,160 --> 00:00:37,162 Been drinking a lot of my piss.
- 00:00:37,162 --> 00:00:38,955 Portal gun's still broken.
- 00:00:38,955 --> 00:00:41,082 Guess that was all part of Evil Morty's plan.
- 00:00:41,166 --> 00:00:43,376 "Evil Morty." Can we stop flattering this guy?
- 00:00:43,460 --> 00:00:45,503 His "plan" was to monologue and fuck off.
- 00:00:45,587 --> 00:00:46,838 He basically threw a tantrum
- 00:00:46,838 --> 00:00:48,548 to announce he was quitting Twitter.
- 00:00:48,548 --> 00:00:51,092 Nobody quits Twitter.
- 00:00:51,176 --> 00:00:52,927 Hey, remember like a second ago
- 00:00:53,011 --> 00:00:55,430 when you pretended not to know who Iron Man was?
- 00:00:55,430 --> 00:00:58,183 Who was that for?
- 00:00:55,513 --> 00:00:58,183 Shh, shh, shush, Morty.
- 00:00:58,183 --> 00:01:00,727 This is how we go. Bear it with grace.
- 00:01:00,727 --> 00:01:04,856 Spinal cord-- Robitussin as a base, then surprise me.
- 00:01:04,856 --> 00:01:07,108 [ Groans ]
- 00:01:12,030 --> 00:01:14,032 [ Glass clinking ]
- 00:01:15,283 --> 00:01:16,493 Mom! Beth maybe!
- 00:01:16,493 --> 00:01:17,619 [ Mouthing words ]
- 00:01:17,619 --> 00:01:19,370 Is she trying to say something?
- 00:01:19,454 --> 00:01:21,122 We-- We can't hear you!
- 00:01:21,206 --> 00:01:23,625 How dumb are-- Beth, you're in a vacuum!
- 00:01:23,625 --> 00:01:25,126 Sound travels on air!
- 00:01:25,210 --> 00:01:27,003 Why am I yelling?
- 00:01:29,631 --> 00:01:30,799 Wow, great. Yeah, that's--
- 00:01:30,799 --> 00:01:32,217 Wow, really worth it.
- 00:01:32,217 --> 00:01:33,635 That was not worth it!
- 00:01:33,635 --> 00:01:34,719 It's corny.
- 00:01:34,803 --> 00:01:36,054 You. Corn.
- 00:01:36,054 --> 00:01:38,556 Dying of starvation here!
- 00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:40,308 Oh, my God. Stop explaining.
- 00:01:40,308 --> 00:01:43,061 Stop explaining!
- 00:01:40,391 --> 00:01:43,061 Are you finished?
- 00:01:43,061 --> 00:01:45,188 She's not finished.
- 00:01:45,188 --> 00:01:47,565 Oh, real mature, r-real classy.
- 00:01:45,271 --> 00:01:47,565 Oh, nice.
- 00:01:47,649 --> 00:02:04,749 {\an8}♪
- 00:02:04,833 --> 00:02:21,891 {\an8}♪
- 00:02:21,975 --> 00:02:23,476 {\an8}It was a good line, honey.
- 00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:25,186 {\an8}I didn't need it to be. I don't care what you think.
- 00:02:25,270 --> 00:02:27,689 {\an8}Oh, my God, she found you. Here, eat, eat, eat.
- 00:02:27,689 --> 00:02:29,190 {\an8}Oh, hell yes!
- 00:02:27,772 --> 00:02:29,190 {\an8}Hold on, buddy,
- 00:02:29,274 --> 00:02:31,025 {\an8}our systems could go into shock from solid food.
- 00:02:31,109 --> 00:02:33,778 {\an8}Digestibot, convert to nutrient mass.
- 00:02:33,862 --> 00:02:36,281 {\an8}[ Digestibot whirring ]
- 00:02:38,950 --> 00:02:40,702 {\an8}[ Ding! ]
- 00:02:42,787 --> 00:02:44,455 {\an8}I'm just gonna risk it. Mmm.
- 00:02:44,539 --> 00:02:46,875 {\an8}Since when you do you guys get stranded?
- 00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:48,001 {\an8}Thank you, by the way.
- 00:02:48,001 --> 00:02:49,043 {\an8}Almost left them out there.
- 00:02:49,127 --> 00:02:50,211 {\an8}Portal travel's broken.
- 00:02:50,295 --> 00:02:52,171 {\an8}Mmm, are these heirloom tomatoes?
- 00:02:52,255 --> 00:02:53,798 {\an8}Digestibot, try these.
- 00:02:53,882 --> 00:02:55,884 {\an8}<i>Yum. Yum.</i> So you can't hop realities anymore.
- 00:02:55,884 --> 00:02:57,969 {\an8}Does that mean you'll finally have to wash your robe?
- 00:02:57,969 --> 00:03:00,847 {\an8}Good point, I need to reboot the portal index immediately.
- 00:03:01,931 --> 00:03:04,058 {\an8}Basically just a hard reset on the fluid.
- 00:03:04,142 --> 00:03:07,228 {\an8}Hold tight, the Earth's gonna shake a bit.
- 00:03:07,312 --> 00:03:10,231 {\an8}[ Electricity crackling, loud rumbling ]
- 00:03:16,988 --> 00:03:18,406 Um...
- 00:03:18,406 --> 00:03:20,033 Oh! Ohh, shit.
- 00:03:20,033 --> 00:03:21,409 Wait, what? W-What's happening?
- 00:03:21,409 --> 00:03:22,744 Instead of resetting portal travel,
- 00:03:22,744 --> 00:03:25,371 {\an8}I may have reset portal <i>travelers.</i>
- 00:03:25,455 --> 00:03:26,748 {\an8}Too late to apologize.
- 00:03:26,748 --> 00:03:29,000 {\an8}Rick, why am I pulsing green?
- 00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:31,377 {\an8}And don't say you don't know because you're pulsing green.
- 00:03:31,461 --> 00:03:32,629 {\an8}Rick, are we about to die?
- 00:03:32,629 --> 00:03:34,339 {\an8}No, we're about to vanish from this reality.
- 00:03:34,339 --> 00:03:36,090 {\an8}That's totally dying!
- 00:03:34,422 --> 00:03:36,090 {\an8}No, it isn't.
- 00:03:36,174 --> 00:03:37,926 It's everyone from this reality returning to
- 00:03:37,926 --> 00:03:39,177 their reality of origin.
- 00:03:39,177 --> 00:03:40,929 Back to our original universes?
- 00:03:40,929 --> 00:03:43,264 I explained it fine, Morty. You're spoonfeeding spoons!
- 00:03:43,348 --> 00:03:45,558 {\an8}W-Where's Summer? Oh, nice, you guys are back.
- 00:03:45,642 --> 00:03:47,894 {\an8}Whoa. Summer, three of us are one-way blind hopping.
- 00:03:47,894 --> 00:03:50,104 {\an8}You gotta help us get back. There's a protocol for this
- 00:03:50,188 --> 00:03:52,190 {\an8}in your chore server, filename Booger AIDs.
- 00:03:52,190 --> 00:03:53,608 {\an8}Every file is Booger AIDS!
- 00:03:53,608 --> 00:03:55,944 {\an8}I-I hate naming things! Just search for words like
- 00:03:55,944 --> 00:03:58,112 {\an8}"one way blind hop reset nav beacon."
- 00:03:58,196 --> 00:03:59,656 {\an8}Why do I have a "reality of origin?"
- 00:03:59,656 --> 00:04:01,074 There's no time to explain, Jerry!
- 00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:02,951 Counting on you, Summer! One way blind hop
- 00:04:02,951 --> 00:04:04,077 beacon protocol!
- 00:04:04,077 --> 00:04:07,622 Here we gooooo!
- 00:04:07,622 --> 00:04:10,291 [ Pulsating ]
- 00:04:10,375 --> 00:04:11,793 So there was time to explain.
- 00:04:11,793 --> 00:04:13,127 {\an8}Don't waste extra precious seconds
- 00:04:13,211 --> 00:04:14,462 {\an8}with your pettiness, Jerry!
- 00:04:14,462 --> 00:04:15,964 {\an8}Summer, let's run down - -
- 00:04:14,545 --> 00:04:15,964 {\an8}One way blind hop
- 00:04:15,964 --> 00:04:17,632 {\an8}reset beacon booger AIDS.
- 00:04:17,632 --> 00:04:19,926 {\an8}Cool.
- 00:04:19,926 --> 00:04:22,470 {\an8}Wow. There was so much time to explain!
- 00:04:22,470 --> 00:04:24,138 {\an8}Yes! Fine, hindsight is 20-20!
- 00:04:24,222 --> 00:04:25,723 {\an8}Who has ever taken this long to vanish?
- 00:04:25,807 --> 00:04:28,142 {\an8}How did I end up not in my own universe?!
- 00:04:28,226 --> 00:04:29,811 {\an8}Oh, my God. The Jerryboree!
- 00:04:29,811 --> 00:04:32,063 {\an8}Ohhhhhhhh, the Jerryboree.
- 00:04:32,063 --> 00:04:34,816 {\an8}Deep cut.
- 00:04:34,816 --> 00:04:37,777 {\an8}Wait, but where's our real Dad and our real Morty?
- 00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:39,320 {\an8}Buried in the backyard!
- 00:04:39,404 --> 00:04:41,698 {\an8}That's what the possums are after.
- 00:04:44,993 --> 00:04:47,203 {\an8}Dad's got you in the family business too, huh?
- 00:04:47,203 --> 00:04:51,791 {\an8}Yeah, Morty's an easy mark, but Rick pays me in things like...
- 00:04:51,791 --> 00:04:53,293 {\an8}Wolverine claws.
- 00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:54,544 {\an8}Whelp, looks like you got this.
- 00:04:54,544 --> 00:04:56,671 {\an8}See you guys in another two years?
- 00:04:56,671 --> 00:04:58,840 {\an8}Or you could stick around for this one?
- 00:04:58,840 --> 00:05:00,758 {\an8}Looks like it involves Grandpa's grody citadel.
- 00:05:00,842 --> 00:05:03,011 {\an8}We could, you know, break things, loot stuff.
- 00:05:03,011 --> 00:05:05,638 Should probably get back to...
- 00:05:05,722 --> 00:05:07,056 saving the galaxy.
- 00:05:07,140 --> 00:05:08,433 Please!
- 00:05:08,433 --> 00:05:10,351 Uh... Guess I could loot some stuff.
- 00:05:10,435 --> 00:05:11,686 Fine, yeah, okay, let's make it quick.
- 00:05:11,686 --> 00:05:13,604 Awesome, I've never been. Let's do this.
- 00:05:13,688 --> 00:05:15,690 Okay, adventure family! Whoo!
- 00:05:15,690 --> 00:05:18,776 [ Laughs ] Uh, okay.
- 00:05:23,448 --> 00:05:25,199 Fuck.
- 00:05:25,283 --> 00:05:29,829 {\an8}♪
- 00:05:29,829 --> 00:05:33,207 Excuse me? Bro, Ricks don't pass on this.
- 00:05:35,626 --> 00:05:37,670 Woman: Rick? Is that you?
- 00:05:37,754 --> 00:05:39,380 Yeah... Diane.
- 00:05:39,464 --> 00:05:41,215 You've been gone so long.
- 00:05:41,299 --> 00:05:42,884 Did you find our daughter's killer?
- 00:05:42,884 --> 00:05:44,969 Not yet, sorry. Still looking.
- 00:05:45,053 --> 00:05:47,513 You'll find him. You always do everything
- 00:05:47,597 --> 00:05:49,140 you set your mind to.
- 00:05:49,140 --> 00:05:50,933 Except keep your family alive.
- 00:05:51,017 --> 00:05:52,685 But that was hardly your fault!
- 00:05:52,769 --> 00:05:53,895 Mute.
- 00:05:53,895 --> 00:05:55,730 If I could be muted, I wouldn't be
- 00:05:55,730 --> 00:05:57,190 [voices overlapping] too-too-too good at haunting
- 00:05:57,190 --> 00:05:58,941 you, would I, you dirty bear?
- 00:05:59,025 --> 00:06:01,069 Yeah, forgot I wanted to be haunted.
- 00:06:01,069 --> 00:06:02,737 I guess you predicted you might.
- 00:06:02,737 --> 00:06:04,864 That's where haunting comes in handy, huh?
- 00:06:04,864 --> 00:06:07,075 Very good point, sugar.
- 00:06:07,075 --> 00:06:13,581 {\an8}♪
- 00:06:13,581 --> 00:06:14,999 Rick?
- 00:06:15,083 --> 00:06:17,251 [ Animals calling in distance ]
- 00:06:18,336 --> 00:06:20,421 Hello? Original family?
- 00:06:20,505 --> 00:06:22,006 Sorry about last time.
- 00:06:22,090 --> 00:06:24,050 Rick, he was in space prison.
- 00:06:24,050 --> 00:06:25,927 W-We couldn't just-- hello?
- 00:06:25,927 --> 00:06:28,513 - [ Roaring ] - [ Screams ]
- 00:06:28,513 --> 00:06:34,936 {\an8}♪
- 00:06:34,936 --> 00:06:36,854 Aw, geez.
- 00:06:36,938 --> 00:06:39,273 {\an8}♪
- 00:06:39,357 --> 00:06:40,942 [ Gasps ]
- 00:06:40,942 --> 00:06:52,745 {\an8}♪
- 00:06:54,372 --> 00:06:56,874 Ahh.
- 00:06:56,958 --> 00:06:57,959 [ Can clanking ]
- 00:06:57,959 --> 00:06:59,752 [ Grunts ] Ah, fuck.
- 00:06:59,836 --> 00:07:02,421 Damn it, Morty, there's no doctors anymore.
- 00:07:02,505 --> 00:07:03,506 Dad?
- 00:07:03,506 --> 00:07:06,634 {\an8}♪
- 00:07:06,634 --> 00:07:08,970 Figures it's underwhelming the one time I visit.
- 00:07:08,970 --> 00:07:10,888 Yeah, sorry, usually there's cowboy
- 00:07:10,972 --> 00:07:12,974 Rick and Mortys and stuff.
- 00:07:12,974 --> 00:07:14,308 Oh, looks like they could use a couple
- 00:07:14,392 --> 00:07:16,811 repairman Rick and Mortys, right?
- 00:07:16,811 --> 00:07:18,771 Oh, tight, little scavenger dudes!
- 00:07:18,855 --> 00:07:21,149 If they shoot at us I'm allowed to--
- 00:07:21,816 --> 00:07:22,942 ...do this.
- 00:07:22,942 --> 00:07:24,861 Shit, yeah!
- 00:07:26,988 --> 00:07:29,073 Space Mom, get in on this!
- 00:07:32,493 --> 00:07:33,703 Cool Mom!
- 00:07:33,703 --> 00:07:36,581 Let's keep it moving. I don't have all day.
- 00:07:36,581 --> 00:07:38,166 I got it!
- 00:07:38,166 --> 00:07:39,667 [ Screaming ]
- 00:07:39,667 --> 00:07:41,460 I got it! I got it!
- 00:07:41,544 --> 00:07:43,212 Sorry!
- 00:07:43,296 --> 00:07:44,297 Sorry!
- 00:07:44,297 --> 00:07:46,924 I got it. Sorry!
- 00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:49,677 I was gonna do it.
- 00:07:49,677 --> 00:07:52,346 Ugh. Terrestrials, am I right?
- 00:07:52,430 --> 00:07:54,599 Diane: I kept up the search in your absence.
- 00:07:54,599 --> 00:07:56,684 You want a new list of potential locations?
- 00:07:56,684 --> 00:07:59,270 You're always just one room away, huh?
- 00:07:59,270 --> 00:08:00,688 Yeah, uh, remember?
- 00:08:00,688 --> 00:08:02,732 You thought if you could see or touch me,
- 00:08:02,732 --> 00:08:05,151 it might give you a level of com-com-comfort.
- 00:08:05,151 --> 00:08:06,944 Right. Can't have that.
- 00:08:07,028 --> 00:08:08,029 Come on, Summer.
- 00:08:08,029 --> 00:08:10,323 Who's Summer? Should I be jealous?
- 00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:13,743 I hope Summer knows what happens to the people you love!
- 00:08:13,743 --> 00:08:15,745 [ Doorbell rings ]
- 00:08:18,372 --> 00:08:19,290 Hey, Rick!
- 00:08:19,290 --> 00:08:21,626 Hey, Mr. Goldmanbachmajorian.
- 00:08:21,626 --> 00:08:23,336 S-Still alive, huh? W-What's up?
- 00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:26,130 I was wondering if you could help me make sense of
- 00:08:26,214 --> 00:08:28,007 a note I found this morning?
- 00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:30,968 It's written by someone claiming to be me.
- 00:08:31,052 --> 00:08:34,013 They say my mind is held captive in a time loop,
- 00:08:34,013 --> 00:08:36,182 trapped in the day of a traumatic event
- 00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:38,392 by the agony of a formidable intelligence.
- 00:08:38,476 --> 00:08:41,062 But also that my captor forgot about aging--
- 00:08:41,062 --> 00:08:43,898 that my body spoils and yearns for death
- 00:08:43,898 --> 00:08:46,234 while my soul remains stuck in place,
- 00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:48,194 caught like a fly in amber.
- 00:08:48,194 --> 00:08:50,571 Right. I used to <i>drink</i> drink.
- 00:08:50,655 --> 00:08:52,615 Uh, no clue, pal. That's okay.
- 00:08:52,615 --> 00:08:54,909 I found other notes in the trash just like it.
- 00:08:54,909 --> 00:08:56,869 Poor weirdo. I pity them.
- 00:08:56,953 --> 00:08:58,496 Wish they could let go and move on.
- 00:08:58,496 --> 00:09:00,539 Sounds healthy.
- 00:08:58,579 --> 00:09:00,539 Sure would be!
- 00:09:03,167 --> 00:09:04,377 Ohhhhhh!
- 00:09:04,377 --> 00:09:06,545 Sweet death.
- 00:09:06,629 --> 00:09:08,005 Diane: Was that symbolic?
- 00:09:08,089 --> 00:09:09,423 Are you letting go?
- 00:09:09,507 --> 00:09:11,717 I understand, baby. I forgive you--
- 00:09:11,801 --> 00:09:13,719 You don't get to say that! You're not her.
- 00:09:13,803 --> 00:09:16,055 You're a thing I built to torture myself.
- 00:09:16,055 --> 00:09:18,224 This whole fucking timeline is cursed.
- 00:09:18,224 --> 00:09:19,392 I gotta get out of here.
- 00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:21,060 Because you want to move on.
- 00:09:21,060 --> 00:09:22,228 Because I don't.
- 00:09:22,228 --> 00:09:24,063 And [burps] I have to.
- 00:09:24,063 --> 00:09:25,856 I came back on accident.
- 00:09:25,940 --> 00:09:27,275 Guy I'm looking for, he's...
- 00:09:27,275 --> 00:09:30,194 he's not findable, Diane.
- 00:09:30,278 --> 00:09:32,572 I live with a version of Beth, now.
- 00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:34,782 Sounds like a version of nice.
- 00:09:34,782 --> 00:09:35,783 We have grandkids.
- 00:09:35,783 --> 00:09:36,951 Tha-- That's who Summer is.
- 00:09:36,951 --> 00:09:38,744 She's gonna get me out of here.
- 00:09:38,828 --> 00:09:40,079 She reminds me of you.
- 00:09:40,079 --> 00:09:42,915 Oh, really? Is she dead too?
- 00:09:42,999 --> 00:09:44,125 Bye, Diane.
- 00:09:44,125 --> 00:09:45,543 You're not honestly gonna fly into
- 00:09:45,543 --> 00:09:47,628 that rift without coordinates, are you?
- 00:09:47,712 --> 00:09:49,297 Don't give up on us, Rick!
- 00:09:49,297 --> 00:09:50,715 I don't make the rules!
- 00:09:50,715 --> 00:09:53,467 Haunters gonna haunt!
- 00:09:53,551 --> 00:09:58,139 {\an8}♪
- 00:09:58,139 --> 00:10:00,641 Diane: Baby? Are you killing yourself?
- 00:10:00,725 --> 00:10:03,978 I'm more embracing the "win-win" of risking my life.
- 00:10:03,978 --> 00:10:05,646 [ Inhales deeply ]
- 00:10:05,730 --> 00:10:06,856 {\an8}♪
- 00:10:06,856 --> 00:10:08,482 [ Computer beeping rapidly ]
- 00:10:08,566 --> 00:10:13,070 {\an8}♪
- 00:10:13,154 --> 00:10:14,363 Where's Mom and Summer?
- 00:10:14,447 --> 00:10:15,698 Oh, they're gone.
- 00:10:15,698 --> 00:10:17,908 Sorry, Morty. Gone gone?
- 00:10:17,992 --> 00:10:19,952 We spent a long time in that ice.
- 00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:23,789 A gentle mutant licked us out, but Beth got sick, and Summer...
- 00:10:23,873 --> 00:10:26,125 didn't thaw right. [ Grunts ]
- 00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:29,503 With no one left to blame, I finally had to deal with myself.
- 00:10:29,587 --> 00:10:31,505 Buried my grief at Barnes & Noble.
- 00:10:31,589 --> 00:10:33,257 "Four Agreements," "Eat Pray Love,"
- 00:10:33,341 --> 00:10:35,426 Frank Miller's "The Dark Knight Returns."
- 00:10:35,426 --> 00:10:37,136 Learned to accept things for what they are.
- 00:10:37,136 --> 00:10:38,512 [ Grunts ]
- 00:10:38,596 --> 00:10:41,432 In a few of these, the whole brain is still intact.
- 00:10:41,432 --> 00:10:43,559 Makes you wonder if some people were still in there,
- 00:10:43,559 --> 00:10:45,353 just trapped in the horror.
- 00:10:45,353 --> 00:10:47,063 Anyway, it's awesome protein.
- 00:10:47,063 --> 00:10:48,397 I'm so sorry, Dad.
- 00:10:48,481 --> 00:10:52,151 But my real, original Dad beat the apocalypse.
- 00:10:52,151 --> 00:10:54,779 I-I-I guess we all underestimated you.
- 00:10:54,779 --> 00:10:56,739 Hey, w-what's that game we always used to
- 00:10:56,739 --> 00:10:59,450 try to play as a family, y-- the one we never finished?
- 00:10:59,450 --> 00:11:01,452 Downbeat.
- 00:10:59,533 --> 00:11:01,452 Yes! Let's play Downbeat.
- 00:11:01,452 --> 00:11:03,788 I-I bet I can find it! We can finish now.
- 00:11:03,788 --> 00:11:07,041 Yeah, you should totally do that.
- 00:11:10,211 --> 00:11:12,004 Hey, yeah, cool, I-I got it!
- 00:11:12,088 --> 00:11:14,256 We'll play Downbeat and we'll-- we'll camp here
- 00:11:14,340 --> 00:11:16,258 tonight and then rebuild the house.
- 00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:18,844 You know, we got food, fresh water,
- 00:11:18,928 --> 00:11:20,596 and we've got family.
- 00:11:20,596 --> 00:11:22,306 The fuck?
- 00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:25,476 Jerry: <i>Morty. I wrote this note in advance</i>
- 00:11:25,476 --> 00:11:27,353 <i>in case you're wondering how I left so fast.</i>
- 00:11:27,353 --> 00:11:29,230 <i>My plan is to wait for you to turn your back,</i>
- 00:11:29,230 --> 00:11:31,148 <i>then I'm going to grab all your shit and split.</i>
- 00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:32,900 <i>Depending on how long you were out of the room,</i>
- 00:11:32,900 --> 00:11:35,444 <i>you'll probably be thinking I can't be that far away</i>
- 00:11:35,528 --> 00:11:37,988 <i>and you'll want to foll--</i>
- 00:11:38,072 --> 00:11:39,573 [ Grunts ]
- 00:11:39,657 --> 00:11:41,325 Jerry: <i>Morty, wrote this fast 'cause had to set trap.</i>
- 00:11:41,409 --> 00:11:42,827 <i>Thought you'd have cooler shit. See other note, bye.</i>
- 00:11:42,827 --> 00:11:44,203 Motherfu--
- 00:11:45,121 --> 00:11:47,039 Morty: Whoa-whoa! Slow down! Slow down!
- 00:11:47,623 --> 00:11:49,208 {\an8}Not cool! Oh!
- 00:11:49,208 --> 00:11:50,418 What the hell, Dad?
- 00:11:50,418 --> 00:11:51,752 Don't take it personal, Morty.
- 00:11:51,836 --> 00:11:53,129 That's one of the Four Agreements.
- 00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:54,713 I don't remember the other three, but I know
- 00:11:54,797 --> 00:11:56,924 Commissioner Gordon was cool with Batman moving on.
- 00:11:56,924 --> 00:11:58,801 Batman doesn't abandon people!
- 00:11:58,801 --> 00:12:00,302 You abandoned us.
- 00:12:00,386 --> 00:12:02,763 I deserve that. But, you know, it...
- 00:12:02,847 --> 00:12:03,848 it improved you.
- 00:12:03,848 --> 00:12:05,975 Oh, am I cool enough for you now?
- 00:12:05,975 --> 00:12:07,184 Well, that was easy.
- 00:12:07,268 --> 00:12:09,270 It only cost me fucking everything.
- 00:12:09,270 --> 00:12:11,355 Whoa, hey, I-I--
- 00:12:09,353 --> 00:12:11,355 You came back and talked
- 00:12:11,439 --> 00:12:13,190 about us like we weren't people, Morty!
- 00:12:13,274 --> 00:12:15,109 Then you bailed and left us to freeze!
- 00:12:15,109 --> 00:12:16,902 I-I was apologizing for that earlier--
- 00:12:16,986 --> 00:12:19,613 Your mom and sister <i>died,</i> Morty!
- 00:12:19,697 --> 00:12:22,366 [ Sighs ] And I moved on.
- 00:12:22,450 --> 00:12:23,659 From caring.
- 00:12:23,659 --> 00:12:26,203 And that is the best deal you will ever get.
- 00:12:26,287 --> 00:12:28,289 So take it. Please don't go.
- 00:12:28,289 --> 00:12:31,375 I-If Rick comes back, we ca-- we can find you a new reality,
- 00:12:31,459 --> 00:12:34,128 a new Mom, new Summer, a... job!
- 00:12:34,128 --> 00:12:35,629 Oh, you don't get it, kid.
- 00:12:35,713 --> 00:12:38,132 Except for this conversation, my life is perfect.
- 00:12:38,132 --> 00:12:42,178 Rick was always right. Everyone needs to let go.
- 00:12:43,471 --> 00:12:45,431 [ Crying ]
- 00:12:45,431 --> 00:12:46,724 [ Footsteps galloping ]
- 00:12:46,724 --> 00:12:48,225 Aww, you came back.
- 00:12:48,309 --> 00:12:50,186 I guess we really did form a bond.
- 00:12:50,186 --> 00:12:51,604 Ow! Hey, stop it!
- 00:12:51,604 --> 00:12:53,981 Get away from me! No, help!
- 00:12:53,981 --> 00:12:56,650 Alright, pin dropped, Grandpa!
- 00:12:56,734 --> 00:12:58,152 Come and get us.
- 00:12:58,152 --> 00:12:59,695 {\an8}♪
- 00:12:59,695 --> 00:13:01,655 Rick: Come on, come on, come on!
- 00:13:01,739 --> 00:13:04,116 Diane: Baby? Something to keep in mind--
- 00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:06,410 If you were pulled home by whatever happened,
- 00:13:06,494 --> 00:13:08,996 it's likely our target was, as well.
- 00:13:08,996 --> 00:13:13,834 It's also likely he's having as much trouble leaving as you are.
- 00:13:13,918 --> 00:13:16,170 He's trapped.
- 00:13:16,170 --> 00:13:17,171 [ Monitor beeping ]
- 00:13:17,171 --> 00:13:18,172 Summer: <i>Grandpa!</i>
- 00:13:18,172 --> 00:13:20,132 Oh, fuck yes!
- 00:13:23,928 --> 00:13:25,179 <i>Grandp-- ...andpa?</i>
- 00:13:25,179 --> 00:13:27,348 Summer! Gold star, always believed in you.
- 00:13:27,348 --> 00:13:28,849 <i>N-Now the hard part.</i>
- 00:13:27,431 --> 00:13:28,849 Hard part?
- 00:13:28,933 --> 00:13:30,851 <i>Way worse things than me can see that beacon, too.</i>
- 00:13:30,935 --> 00:13:32,853 <i>Hunker down and protect it while I grab Morty.</i>
- 00:13:32,937 --> 00:13:34,813 <i>Rick out! Try to survive!</i>
- 00:13:34,897 --> 00:13:36,190 Oh, shit.
- 00:13:36,190 --> 00:13:37,858 Domestic Mom should hide maybe?
- 00:13:37,942 --> 00:13:39,026 "Domestic Mom"?
- 00:13:39,026 --> 00:13:40,694 I mean, she's the cool space one.
- 00:13:40,778 --> 00:13:43,489 Look, I'm not looking to get caught in whatever this is.
- 00:13:43,489 --> 00:13:45,115 You guys can both hide maybe, hash it out.
- 00:13:45,199 --> 00:13:46,325 Oh, quit talking down!
- 00:13:46,325 --> 00:13:48,369 I'm you with the patience to do laundry.
- 00:13:48,369 --> 00:13:50,371 Summer: Mom, stop being jealous of our bond!
- 00:13:50,371 --> 00:13:52,998 She ran from our choices. I have to parent them.
- 00:13:53,082 --> 00:13:56,210 It's not like I didn't care. That's what the clone was for.
- 00:13:56,210 --> 00:13:57,378 Aah!
- 00:13:57,378 --> 00:13:58,712 Moms!
- 00:13:58,796 --> 00:14:01,840 [ Panting, sobbing ]
- 00:14:03,467 --> 00:14:05,970 [ Whooshing ]
- 00:14:11,809 --> 00:14:12,893 Morty!
- 00:14:12,977 --> 00:14:14,061 Rick? I knew it!
- 00:14:14,061 --> 00:14:15,396 I knew you wouldn't leave me!
- 00:14:15,396 --> 00:14:16,981 Ow! The fuck?
- 00:14:16,981 --> 00:14:18,899 Morty, did you see another Rick here?
- 00:14:18,983 --> 00:14:20,985 Nondescript haircut, sci-fi jacket?
- 00:14:20,985 --> 00:14:23,404 Eh, of course you didn't see him, you'd be dead.
- 00:14:23,404 --> 00:14:24,905 Or you'd be a bomb.
- 00:14:24,989 --> 00:14:26,574 Do you feel bomby?
- 00:14:26,574 --> 00:14:28,242 Nah, you woulda blown up by now.
- 00:14:28,242 --> 00:14:29,535 Wasn't the Rick here dead?
- 00:14:29,535 --> 00:14:31,412 Th-That's why you pick places, right?
- 00:14:31,412 --> 00:14:33,914 Uh, well, your Rick, uh,
- 00:14:33,998 --> 00:14:36,083 yeah, not dead, more like not around.
- 00:14:36,083 --> 00:14:38,919 When I met you, I was sorta hoping he might turn up one day.
- 00:14:39,003 --> 00:14:40,921 You son of a bitch! I got you!
- 00:14:41,005 --> 00:14:42,590 W-W-Where are we going?
- 00:14:42,590 --> 00:14:44,550 To kill your grandpa, little buddy.
- 00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:45,843 Wait, what?
- 00:14:45,843 --> 00:14:47,052 I don't understand.
- 00:14:47,136 --> 00:14:49,179 My original Rick killed your family?
- 00:14:49,263 --> 00:14:50,764 And you were just waiting for him to come back?
- 00:14:50,848 --> 00:14:52,391 Seems like you understand fine, Morty.
- 00:14:52,391 --> 00:14:54,059 That was A+ re-piping.
- 00:14:54,143 --> 00:14:56,937 We're here.
- 00:14:57,021 --> 00:14:58,939 This guy, Morty, he hates being found
- 00:14:59,023 --> 00:15:00,441 but loves building elaborate shit.
- 00:15:00,441 --> 00:15:02,067 Like-- Like-- Like playing a ton of "Minecraft"
- 00:15:02,151 --> 00:15:03,360 but all on a private server.
- 00:15:03,444 --> 00:15:05,279 Am I in a fucking K-hole right now?
- 00:15:05,279 --> 00:15:07,406 What is going on?
- 00:15:09,366 --> 00:15:12,953 <i>Whoa, hoho, you found me!</i>
- 00:15:13,037 --> 00:15:14,705 <i>I shoot the first monitor, too.</i>
- 00:15:14,705 --> 00:15:16,373 <i>Listen, I'm not here.</i>
- 00:15:16,457 --> 00:15:18,334 <i>Or am I?</i>
- 00:15:18,334 --> 00:15:19,793 <i>There's the clone you found.</i>
- 00:15:19,877 --> 00:15:21,211 <i>Or maybe it's me, all naked!</i>
- 00:15:21,295 --> 00:15:22,921 <i>Just a lil Keyser Soze.</i>
- 00:15:23,005 --> 00:15:24,798 <i>I mean, why would I admit it's not?</i>
- 00:15:24,882 --> 00:15:26,133 <i>Oh-hoho, yeah! Look at him!</i>
- 00:15:26,133 --> 00:15:27,635 <i>Look at him go, look at him dance.</i>
- 00:15:27,635 --> 00:15:30,095 <i>O-Or me. Again, it might be me,</i>
- 00:15:30,179 --> 00:15:32,348 <i>like a "Saw" thing. I'm very sneaky.</i>
- 00:15:32,348 --> 00:15:34,099 <i>Here's a bunch of killbots to deal with</i>
- 00:15:34,183 --> 00:15:36,810 <i>while ya wrestle with that.</i>
- 00:15:39,980 --> 00:15:42,107 <i>Obviously, I don't know who I'm talking to here.</i>
- 00:15:42,191 --> 00:15:44,360 <i>It's all prerecorded.</i>
- 00:15:45,152 --> 00:15:46,487 <i>But if you got this far,</i>
- 00:15:46,487 --> 00:15:48,572 <i>you probably think you're real special.</i>
- 00:15:48,656 --> 00:15:49,782 <i>Tell you what...</i>
- 00:15:49,782 --> 00:15:50,824 <i>Oop! There he goes!</i>
- 00:15:50,908 --> 00:15:52,451 <i>Maybe that actually was me!</i>
- 00:15:52,451 --> 00:15:53,619 <i>If you follow him down there,</i>
- 00:15:53,619 --> 00:15:54,828 <i>we can do a big fight.</i>
- 00:15:54,912 --> 00:15:57,331 <i>50% chance I'm not lying.</i>
- 00:15:57,331 --> 00:15:58,666 {\an8}♪
- 00:15:58,666 --> 00:16:00,459 Space Beth: <i>We're in trouble, asshole!</i>
- 00:16:00,459 --> 00:16:01,794 <i>I shouldn't have to beg.</i>
- 00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:03,003 Wait, my moms are in trouble?
- 00:16:03,087 --> 00:16:04,505 Those versions of them are.
- 00:16:04,505 --> 00:16:06,882 W-We gotta save them! Rick, this is an obvious trap.
- 00:16:06,882 --> 00:16:09,176 If you go down there he's just gonna kill you.
- 00:16:09,176 --> 00:16:11,011 Good!
- 00:16:09,259 --> 00:16:11,011 What?
- 00:16:11,929 --> 00:16:13,430 Now what?!
- 00:16:13,514 --> 00:16:15,974 If you don't care if you die, why do you care if I die?
- 00:16:16,058 --> 00:16:17,601 Knock it off! Get out of here!
- 00:16:17,685 --> 00:16:20,312 You did this last season! You're like a suicide bomber!
- 00:16:20,396 --> 00:16:21,522 Takes one to know one.
- 00:16:21,522 --> 00:16:23,524 Yeah, well, you get it from him, not me.
- 00:16:23,524 --> 00:16:27,194 I don't know him. <i>You're</i> my grandpa, Rick.
- 00:16:27,194 --> 00:16:29,196 Rick and Morty. A hundred years.
- 00:16:29,196 --> 00:16:31,240 <i>This place totally might go up, by the way.</i>
- 00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:32,866 <i>Here's a bunch of countdowns.</i>
- 00:16:32,950 --> 00:16:36,203 <i>One of them's probably accurate.</i>
- 00:16:36,203 --> 00:16:39,373 Ah, fucking stupid 5th-dimensional stomach juices.
- 00:16:39,373 --> 00:16:41,166 Sorry for the sitcom fight,
- 00:16:41,250 --> 00:16:42,668 and maybe getting us digested.
- 00:16:42,668 --> 00:16:44,044 You've got incredible timing.
- 00:16:44,128 --> 00:16:45,546 Oh, don't be a bitch. I'm parenting.
- 00:16:45,546 --> 00:16:46,880 Makes sense you don't recognize it.
- 00:16:46,964 --> 00:16:48,465 You've been out of practice for a while.
- 00:16:48,549 --> 00:16:50,008 Good! I'm glad that they have you!
- 00:16:50,092 --> 00:16:51,885 I don't want to be "Space Mom."
- 00:16:51,969 --> 00:16:53,011 You've made that clear.
- 00:16:53,095 --> 00:16:54,304 Just don't let Summer mistake
- 00:16:54,388 --> 00:16:56,056 your rejection of her for good taste.
- 00:16:56,140 --> 00:16:58,809 I'm not trying to. It's all her!
- 00:16:58,809 --> 00:17:00,310 [ Gasps ]
- 00:17:02,354 --> 00:17:04,898 Jesus! It'd be cool if you were around more.
- 00:17:04,982 --> 00:17:06,233 I don't wanna get married.
- 00:17:06,233 --> 00:17:08,861 I'm 17. My affection is the wind.
- 00:17:08,861 --> 00:17:11,405 Don't try to compete for it.
- 00:17:11,405 --> 00:17:13,741 I could hear every word of that through the helmets.
- 00:17:13,741 --> 00:17:15,743 Thank fuck I only had to kill most of them.
- 00:17:15,743 --> 00:17:17,911 Jesus, that ship really has sailed.
- 00:17:17,995 --> 00:17:23,083 {\an8}♪
- 00:17:23,167 --> 00:17:26,712 And now we feast!
- 00:17:29,256 --> 00:17:30,591 [ Roaring in agony ]
- 00:17:30,591 --> 00:17:32,259 This emergency was oversold to me.
- 00:17:32,259 --> 00:17:33,427 - Grandpa! - Morty!
- 00:17:33,427 --> 00:17:35,220 Moms! Wait, i-if they had to
- 00:17:35,304 --> 00:17:37,848 wear helmets-- I do childproofing stuff while you're asleep.
- 00:17:37,848 --> 00:17:39,141 Why don't you childproof Dad?
- 00:17:39,141 --> 00:17:40,392 Ah, great reminder.
- 00:17:39,224 --> 00:17:40,392 Wait!
- 00:17:40,476 --> 00:17:42,060 Time to get Jerry. Ugh.
- 00:17:42,144 --> 00:17:44,021 Maybe I wouldn't be so uptight
- 00:17:44,021 --> 00:17:46,190 If I wasn't married to an unemployed
- 00:17:46,190 --> 00:17:47,941 receptacle of human fear!
- 00:17:48,025 --> 00:17:49,860 Get a job, Dad, it's been a decade.
- 00:17:49,860 --> 00:17:51,069 Woof. Pretty brutal, Jer.
- 00:17:51,153 --> 00:17:52,571 I-I know a good alligator park
- 00:17:52,571 --> 00:17:53,781 if you wanna kill yourself.
- 00:17:53,781 --> 00:17:55,407 I got expelled today.
- 00:17:53,864 --> 00:17:55,407 [ Doorbell rings ]
- 00:17:55,491 --> 00:17:57,034 - What the hell, Morty?! - Oh, no, you got expelled.
- 00:17:57,034 --> 00:17:58,494 - Whoa, what a horrible thing. - You are so fucking dumb!
- 00:17:58,494 --> 00:18:00,078 - Too bad, Morty. - Hi, hon.
- 00:18:00,162 --> 00:18:02,790 [ Gasps ] Woof, some real Season 2 vibes
- 00:18:02,790 --> 00:18:04,041 in there, you know what I'm sayin?
- 00:18:04,041 --> 00:18:05,709 You know, never thought I'd say this,
- 00:18:05,793 --> 00:18:09,129 but I think I'm glad we spent that time divorced.
- 00:18:09,213 --> 00:18:11,924 Er, one second. I'll build a fucking swing set in the backyard!
- 00:18:11,924 --> 00:18:14,384 You know, I may technically be from here.
- 00:18:14,468 --> 00:18:16,970 But I'm a goddamn interdimensional traveler now.
- 00:18:17,054 --> 00:18:20,224 And all of you can kiss my sci-fi ass.
- 00:18:20,224 --> 00:18:22,226 [ Grunts ]
- 00:18:25,562 --> 00:18:28,398 [ Laughter ] It gets me every time.
- 00:18:28,482 --> 00:18:31,068 Wow, what an amazing joke I just told.
- 00:18:31,068 --> 00:18:32,820 A-And also, what an adventure.
- 00:18:32,820 --> 00:18:34,780 You know, I guess it doesn't matter where we're from
- 00:18:34,780 --> 00:18:36,115 if we're together, huh?
- 00:18:36,115 --> 00:18:37,699 Good-- Good final moral thing.
- 00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:39,910 This is everyone's "original dimension" now.
- 00:18:39,910 --> 00:18:41,328 Great wrap-ups, kids.
- 00:18:41,328 --> 00:18:43,872 - Ugh, you're back. - Oh, shit, Season 2 Jerry!
- 00:18:43,956 --> 00:18:45,290 Look, before you bust my balls,
- 00:18:45,374 --> 00:18:46,667 can someone help with the shower?
- 00:18:46,667 --> 00:18:48,752 It's colder than Beth on our anniversary.
- 00:18:48,836 --> 00:18:51,088 Also, look who I found in Rick's room.
- 00:18:51,088 --> 00:18:52,923 Mmmm, I'm Mr. Frundles!
- 00:18:52,923 --> 00:18:54,258 I don't care how cute he is.
- 00:18:54,258 --> 00:18:56,093 We agreed no boogens in the house.
- 00:18:56,093 --> 00:18:57,678 Wait, Season 2 Jerry, don't!
- 00:18:57,678 --> 00:18:59,638 Whoa!
- 00:18:57,761 --> 00:18:59,638 Summer: Mr. Frundles!
- 00:18:59,638 --> 00:19:00,973 Everybody in the car.
- 00:19:00,973 --> 00:19:02,933 Mmmm, I'm Mr. Frundles!
- 00:19:02,933 --> 00:19:04,935 Wait, but I thought <i>he</i> was Mr. Frundles.
- 00:19:04,935 --> 00:19:06,812 Everybody in the car! Now!
- 00:19:06,812 --> 00:19:09,147 Nyah! Mmmm, I'm Mr. Frundles!
- 00:19:09,231 --> 00:19:11,775 [ Overlapping "Mmmm, I'm Mr. Frundles!" ]
- 00:19:11,859 --> 00:19:14,111 {\an8}♪
- 00:19:14,111 --> 00:19:15,529 Beth: What the fuck, Dad?!
- 00:19:15,529 --> 00:19:17,239 Why would you bring that thing into our house?
- 00:19:17,239 --> 00:19:18,740 It was cute! Fuck.
- 00:19:18,824 --> 00:19:20,117 We gotta find a new timeline now!
- 00:19:20,117 --> 00:19:22,160 You know how hard that shit is without portals?
- 00:19:22,244 --> 00:19:24,830 We gotta do the thing with the Rift and the beacon again!
- 00:19:24,830 --> 00:19:26,999 The whole fucking episode all over again!
- 00:19:26,999 --> 00:19:29,084 Car, fabricate some vomit bags.
- 00:19:29,084 --> 00:19:31,044 Can't we just go back and fix it?
- 00:19:31,128 --> 00:19:36,425 [ Booming voice ] Mmmm, I'm Mr. Frundles!
- 00:19:38,594 --> 00:19:41,346 I can't believe portal travel's broken.
- 00:19:41,430 --> 00:19:42,639 I'll get to it when I get to it.
- 00:19:42,723 --> 00:19:43,891 Lift with your knees, Mom.
- 00:19:43,891 --> 00:19:46,018 How many times have you done this?
- 00:19:47,144 --> 00:19:48,979 [ Grunts ] Oh, God.
- 00:19:48,979 --> 00:19:51,565 And you swear they die of natural causes?
- 00:19:51,565 --> 00:19:52,816 Mm-hmm, yep.
- 00:19:52,900 --> 00:19:54,735 The exact same as our old timeline?
- 00:19:54,735 --> 00:19:56,528 Even my stuff?
- 00:19:54,818 --> 00:19:56,528 Bit of a rush job, actually,
- 00:19:56,612 --> 00:19:58,739 so they do say "parmesan" weird.
- 00:19:58,739 --> 00:20:00,407 How do they say--
- 00:19:58,822 --> 00:20:00,407 Par-mees-ian.
- 00:20:00,407 --> 00:20:01,867 - Boo. - Jesus Christ.
- 00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:03,702 I could've left you guys! You think the concept of
- 00:20:03,702 --> 00:20:06,330 "family" matters to me? I'm not even your Rick!
- 00:20:06,330 --> 00:20:07,414 - Uh-huh. -"I'm Denial Rick!"
- 00:20:07,414 --> 00:20:09,041 Beth: See you inside, Dad.
- 00:20:09,041 --> 00:20:11,585 Sorry I was such a Dance Mom about Summer.
- 00:20:11,585 --> 00:20:12,753 She's your daughter, too.
- 00:20:12,753 --> 00:20:14,087 No, boundaries are good.
- 00:20:14,171 --> 00:20:17,466 But, uh, speaking of, maybe I've put up too many.
- 00:20:17,466 --> 00:20:19,384 Is it okay if I come around sometimes?
- 00:20:19,468 --> 00:20:20,844 That could be nice.
- 00:20:20,928 --> 00:20:24,014 That's a cute outfit. The one we always wear?
- 00:20:28,101 --> 00:20:30,562 [ Sighs ] Yes, Morty?
- 00:20:30,646 --> 00:20:32,564 You promise I'm not, you know, bait?
- 00:20:32,648 --> 00:20:34,483 T-To make that Rick come back? What?
- 00:20:34,483 --> 00:20:36,526 M-Morty, for you to be bait, the guy'd have to
- 00:20:36,610 --> 00:20:40,113 value something. He truly does not give a shit.
- 00:20:41,698 --> 00:20:43,909 He's the real deal.
- 00:20:45,035 --> 00:20:47,704 Parmeee-san. Par-meees-ian.
- 00:20:47,788 --> 00:20:49,414 Par-mees-ian.
- 00:20:49,498 --> 00:20:51,333 Par-- Parmeeeeeesian. Parmesian.
- 00:20:51,333 --> 00:20:53,168 Gross. I hate it.
- 00:20:51,416 --> 00:20:53,168 Yeah.
- 00:20:53,168 --> 00:21:01,134 {\an8}♪
- 00:21:01,218 --> 00:21:09,017 {\an8}♪
- 00:21:09,101 --> 00:21:25,033 {\an8}♪
- 00:21:27,035 --> 00:21:28,286 [ Rustling ]
- 00:21:28,370 --> 00:21:29,997 Hello? Morty?
- 00:21:29,997 --> 00:21:31,123 That one big rat?
- 00:21:31,123 --> 00:21:32,541 Whoa, this is a development. Gah!
- 00:21:32,541 --> 00:21:34,418 Shh. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa,
- 00:21:34,418 --> 00:21:36,044 lil guy, easy. You're a Jerry, right?
- 00:21:36,128 --> 00:21:37,754 Never got too close to the concept.
- 00:21:37,838 --> 00:21:39,589 Boy, you have really arc'd out.
- 00:21:39,673 --> 00:21:41,049 Were you putting on pants?
- 00:21:41,133 --> 00:21:42,759 What? Oh, yeah, no, I was naked
- 00:21:42,843 --> 00:21:45,721 to fuck with a guy. Speaking of, did you talk to me,
- 00:21:45,721 --> 00:21:47,514 or a little kid around here?
- 00:21:47,514 --> 00:21:48,849 Maybe. Why?
- 00:21:48,849 --> 00:21:51,101 Because if you hate them, too...
- 00:21:51,101 --> 00:21:52,728 I could be down for a little team up.
- 00:21:52,728 --> 00:21:54,354 Eh, I really don't "team up" anymore.
- 00:21:54,438 --> 00:21:56,273 Managing people, such a headache.
- 00:21:56,273 --> 00:21:57,482 Aah!
- 00:21:57,566 --> 00:21:58,775 [ Deep voice ] Fatality...
- 00:21:58,859 --> 00:22:00,777 [ Normal voice ] Jerry wins.
- 00:22:00,861 --> 00:22:03,113 [ Laughing ]
- 00:22:05,323 --> 00:22:06,950 Oh, goddamn dude.
- 00:22:07,034 --> 00:22:08,493 Badass!
- 00:22:09,202 --> 00:22:10,954 [ Groans ]
- 00:22:11,038 --> 00:22:12,497 Why are you here?
- 00:22:12,581 --> 00:22:17,586 Buddy, I have been asking myself that exact same question.
- 00:22:20,589 --> 00:22:22,090 Did you get any of that?
- 00:01:27,745 --> 00:01:29,905 ЭТО ЧАСТНАЯ ВЕЧЕРИНКА ИЛИ МОЖНО ПРИСОЕДИНИТЬСЯ?
- 00:01:38,225 --> 00:01:40,585 КОГДА Я ЭТО ПИСАЛА, Я НЕ ДУМАЛА...
- 00:01:41,725 --> 00:01:43,865 ЧТО ВЫ ТАКИЕ КРИТИКИ
- 00:01:45,185 --> 00:01:47,645 НАВЕРНОЕ, НЕ БУДУ ВАС СПАСАТЬ
- 00:06:52,705 --> 00:06:55,285 «РОЛЛИНГ СТОЯК», «СЕКС-ВОГ», «БИЛЬЯРДНЫЙ ХАСТЛЕР»
- 00:11:10,525 --> 00:11:12,405 2-3 МИНУТЫ БЕСКОНЕЧНОГО ВЕСЕЛЬЯ!
- 00:22:17,985 --> 00:22:19,445 ПОСВЯЩАЕТСЯ МАЙКУ МЕНДЕЛУ
- 00:01:27,330 --> 00:01:29,330 ЦЕ ПРИВАТНА ВЕЧІРКА, ЧИ ДО ВАС МОЖНА ПРИЄДНАТИСЯ?
- 00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:39,720 КОЛИ Я ВИРІШИЛА ЦЕ НАПИСАТИ, ТО НЕ ДУМАЛА...
- 00:01:41,490 --> 00:01:43,660 ...ЩО МЕНЕ БУДУТЬ ТАК НИЩІВНО КРИТИКУВАТИ.
- 00:01:44,900 --> 00:01:46,660 НУ ТО Я ВАС НЕ РЯТУВАТИМУ.